Friday, December 31, 2004

What You Really Want to Hear

  Ok, I have thought it over, and I think it is only fair that my loyal readers end this year by me telling something about myself that no one knows. You should enjoy this.

 I hate football. Can't stand it, never liked it, never will. When I was a small kid, I liked anything that had an engine, and could just scream "POWER". Formula one cars, LeMans, Drag Racing, dirt bikes, Harleys, Drag Boats.....if it moved, and had an engine, I was there!! Hell, at seven years old, I tried to put a lawn mower engine on a bicycle!! I later heard of something called a "go-cart".  But that is another story----

    I loved baseball, but hated footbal. When I was in the seventh grade, my step-dad, brainless fuck that he was, decided that I would play football, come hell or high water! When he learned that I hated the sport, he became even MORE determined that I would play. I said he was a brainless fuck.

    So, he signs me up at the small Mississippi school in the town we lived in at the time. So, I figure, maybe it won't be so bad, I might make some friends(I have never really got on well with people, even when I was young). Boy, was I wrong!

    Seems that the seventh graders were just "meat" for the Big Guys. And I mean BIG. We were put up against seniors! With the pretense that we were holding "tackling dummies". Believe me, WE were the dummies. We got stomped on, ran over, hit way too hard. There were many times that I would get up, only to be too stunned to stay on my feet, so, back down I would go. Always, the bigger guys were screaming for us to get our "baby asses" up.

    Where was my step-dad during all of this? Why, standing right there watching!! If he burns in hell for a million years, it will NEVER be long enough. I still, to this day, remember his laughing face on the sidelines.

     I wasn't allowed to quit, so I got to where I would simply refuse to "suit up". That served to only get me tackled in my street clothes! I have even had the coach tell players to hit me on the bench. Fine, I got tired of being laughed at. I resigned myself to the fact that they were far too big, and strong for me to beat. BUT, BY GOD, they would RESPECT me.

     Everytime I was hit, I would stand back up. I have stood up at times when I could not see, because of blood in my eyes. My blood. Every drop that I tasted, only served to fuel the fire burning inside of me. It became a raging inferno before the year was over, and my mom left this brainless fuck!

     That fire raged inside, and by the time high-school came along, and with the help of my uncle and his buddies, ANYONE who was a jock was in for a rough time. I was the ONLY guy in school who would INTENTIONALLY pick fights with "jocks". I hated them, and tried every way I knew to destroy them. I hate them to this day. I still hate football. Whenever something on tv is pre-empted for football, I hit the ceiling!

     You know how most people hate gay people? That is how much I hate Jocks! At least gay people CAN carry on an intelligent conversation with you. Jocks are big, dumb, empty-headed pieces of shit! They truly ARE the BOTTOM of the gene pool!  Sorry, that's just my opinion. Jocks suck, and that is it.

     The moral of my tale? Don't let people bully you. Sooner or later, even the little dog bites back!! These days, I am 5' 10", with 16 inch biceps, a size 48 chest, and I weigh 256 pounds. Yes, that little dog grew up, and now, no one pushes him around!!!  I told you before that little johnny was broke, I never said that he gave up!!!

Another Year

  Here we are, faced with the prospect of another year....another set of problems, and the old ones we carry with us. I always hear that a lot of suicides happen at this time of year. Are you kiddin' me? C'mon, don't puss out on me now!!  Stick around, see just what I come up with next.

 I am working on a tribute to old Bikers like myself. It should be fairly good. Ahhhh, the good times that I had with my uncle, and all of his "cronies" when I was young. Can anyone out there remember going to protest rallies against helmet laws? Shit, I can!!

    We used to go to the capital building in Lansing Michigan,(only a few blocks from where I lived), camp on the lawn if we had to!! Damn, all of that is gone!

    Full nights of partying, that sometimes turned into DAYS of partying! Typical line from that time--"What is this party for"?  "Hell, it's Tuesday"!!!  Man, sometimes I miss that shit, but just about that time my daughter, wife, or grandchildren will bring me back to reality, and I remember why I left all of that.

  Would I ever change anything in my life?  NO! I might not have gotten married the first time, but even THAT taught me some lessons!  First, and foremost, divorce is a woman's idea!! It has to be. How else can you explain how a woman can marry a man, then, within two years, leave him, and get everything???  Bwahahaha!!!

If you read this, and are thinking of doing something 'not so smart'  for whatever reason, just think about this. I have been at the lowest that a person can get. At just 19 years old, I was carrying two (2) bottles of whiskey with me everyday to get through an eight-hour shift, at some shitty job that I hated.

I woke up one morning and looked into the mirror....what I saw staring back at me was truly frightening! I quit drinking, quit the drugs, and held my head up high. I didn't get rich, but I learned that whatever happened from that moment on, I would control it! Good or bad, it was up to me!!

 To this day, I own an old foot-locker. I bought it when I was just 17. Everything I used to own would fit into that old trunk. I keep it to remind me of just WHERE I came from.

  So, stick with me, guys and girls! Even if you never leave comments. If my writing can touch just ONE life, then I have fulfilled my purpose here on this shitty little rock we call Earth.

   Follow your heart, and it could lead you to magical places!

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

There's Hope for me Yet!

  Well, I went to see the eye doctor this morning. My vision has been failing for the last two (2) years. Doc says everything is cool, my arms are just too short!! Actually, my poor eyesight is only due to my age. He should have a pair of bi-focals ready by Monday. Now, I can get back to my jewelry-making.

    I hope all of you got just what you wanted for Christmas...I surely did!  Here is the good news...I am not rich, not even lower-middle class! I happen to be in a class all my own---independantly BROKE!! But the wife got me some small things, and she gave me the gift of staying with her all these years. What more could a man ask for?? Actually, ALOT!!!

      By that I mean that I got to play with the grandkids on Christmas day!! That was truly all that I wished for. There can be no bigger joy than to be surrounded by the people who know you, and put up with you.

  I hope all of you find what you are looking for. We are ALL searching for SOMETHING, you cannot deny it. Find it, embrace it, and never let it go. I found mine, but it took time and determination. Plus, I never let go of the dream of finding it!!

                                 PEACE TO YOU.

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Why Night Comes...

 Night comes, swiftly, unfailingly. Darkness covers the land and the sea. Ahh, darkness; black, impenetrable, all-hiding, beautiful darkness! The Gods gave Darkness to the Earth for a reason, actually, for a lot of reasons. You shall know why...just read on, if you dare.

     Many things come out into the darkness; demons, ghouls, ghosts, evil things, and even Dragons. Wolves, Tigers, Lions, Bears, Snakes, Spiders, Scorpions, all the things that you fear are here, in the Darkness. Even the evil that man does is mostly kept to the Darkness.

    Many things that are considered evil have always been said to be "Dark" throughout time itself. Even Death himself is known to be "Dark".  Yes, Darkness works out for the best for some of us! Some of us even know about the "Dark Corners" of the mind....makes you think, doesn't it?

    Yes, the Gods gave Darkness to the Earth so that mere mortals would not go completly insane because of seeing the things that come out to play in the night. So, the next time it is Dark, and you hear nothing, and you see afraid, be very afraid!!!!!

   Now, turn out the light, and go to sleep. That's right, pull the covers up nice and tight, for many things roam the night!

 Questions, comments, abusive remarks?? You know where to find me!!!

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Moods--We all have them

Actually, I like some classical music, but like anything else, only in moderation. I have been wondering lately (Yes, I have too much time on my hands). Do some of the things I do or feel make me any less---me?

    I seem to find joy in certain paintings that I have seen before, but noticed nothing in particular at the time. Certain songs, or music holds new meaning for me. I am sometimes struck by the simplest of things as being overly fascinating, like I have missed something in these things for a lifetime!

  Am I becoming 'civilized', settled, or just more mentally disturbed than before? I find myself pondering these thoughts more frequently than before. The simple fact that I can actually sit here long enough to write this is, in itself, a small miracle.

   So, what is happening? Am I 'evolving', finding the 'next level' in life? And just WHEN did Sienfeld quit being funny, and just become another "whiner" in life? I have always liked the "Kramer" character, but more so now than before. Something is changing, and I know it.

   I still have all of the memories of growing up in a Biker-gang, and the awful things that my mother and step-dad did to us kids growing up. But, since my mother's murder, these things just don't seem too important right now.

   My grandmother(maternal) told me that my real dad wanted to get in touch with me. I wrote to him twice in June, after my mother died. I got the same response as always...nothing. He is a horrible person, and likes to do terrible things to people. He is said to be in poor health.

   I say "fuck him, and let him rot". I haven't become so 'warm-and-fuzzy' that I could ever forgive him anything. I thought my mother and I were on our way to some kind of 'understanding' in our lives, and she was suddenly snatched away by Death itself. A sad end to a sad life...............

   I still trust no one, and I still hate people just as always...I just seem to enjoy some things that I never did before. I have no idea what is going on, but to find "beauty" in things,(other than engines, or machinery) is just not 'like me'.

 ......and he continues to slip, uncontrollably, toward the black abyss....never to be seen again.   An original quote from me, although I am sure that someone, somewhere, has said it before me....I can't be the only one............

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Deer Hunting (or the lack thereof)

  Deer hunting, the all-time favorite sport of MEN. If you happen to be one of the 'other' type of man, then just skip this writing, it could get too rough.

      I have been reading in my deer-mags that a lot of Northern, and some Eastern states are having trouble with deer populations actually STARVING!!! Too many deer around, no hunters. No way to control deer populations from growing un-controllably. What?!?! Deer starving??

      Suburbs, housing developments, mini-malls, they are all to blame. But the burden ultimately falls on the hunters---or, the 'so-called' MEN in these areas. What happened? Are some of you so damn "civilized" that you don't hunt to put meat on your family's table? I have certainly seen some of the wives from those areas complaining about the price of meat in the super-markets! Here you have FREE, FRESH MEAT just handed to you, and you refuse to kill it.

    Can any of you even SKIN a deer? Hell, one of my friends showed up this past Friday to have me cut up a whole deer for him(he trusts me). I couldn't get out to his truck fast enough, knives, and sharpening steel in both hands!! I had that deer carved up in no time! Hell, he even offered me half of it, but I declined, I know he has a family to feed.

    I have read that the local gov'ts have to bring in "snipers" at night to dispatch the deer in those places. At least THEY know what to do with the meat; they donate every bit of it to local foodbanks, rest homes, and orphanages. The snipers are just hunters, VERY GOOD HUNTERS, but hunters all the same.

    It is not expensive to start hunting, you only need a license, a firearm, and the BALLS to go out and KILL an animal! It's easy, really. All men have the instinct. If you are too squeamish to actually gut, skin, and butcher the animal, then take along someone who is willing to do so. Letting the animals slowly starve is just cruel. Don't believe me? Just tie your dog up outside, and feed him about four(4) pieces of dry food a day....won't be long before someone comes around to lock you up, yep, seems "cruelty to animals" is against the law. Imagine that!

      In the time it has taken me to type this message, somewhere around 15 to 20 deer were killed in my county alone...our deer never starve. No dogs were injured in the posting of this message.

Saturday, December 18, 2004


Merry Freakin' Christmas!!!  What, you expected "Happy Holidays"? I could care less WHAT the media tells you, I say Merry Christmas! Don't like it? Kiss my Ass! The flag flying outside MY HOUSE has 50 stars, and 13 red-and-white bars!!!

 I DO NOT need your "imported" beer, your fancy cheeses, or your nose in my business. YOU can say just what you WANT during the Holidays, Happy Kwanza, happy Chaunaka(I know I can't spell it!), whatever you want. THAT is the joy of living here in this country.

  What is this, a softening of the "grumpy old man" for the Government?  HELL NO! I never said it was perfect, but, for the most part, we ARE FREE to do pretty much as we please. The fact that I rail against the gov't in such a public forum, and DON'T end up in some "Gulag" should be proof of the greatest country in the world!

     If I prefer "Merry Christmas", then leave me alone, it is my right. If I speak badly about the people who commit terrorist acts against America, then shut the fuck up and listen...or walk away....there IS a third option, but I don't think you really want a boot in your ass!

   So, Merry Christmas to all, and to all, "Be Cool"!!!!!!!

Thursday, December 9, 2004


  Does GreenPeace come in different colors? Maybe a kind of "light green", or "off green"? Don't worry, it will make sense in a minute....

     As most of you know, I have a 12 year old girl still at home, if you don't know that by now, then you aren't paying attention. I used to hunt-deer, rabbits, squirrels, whatever. I quit my hunting because of my injuries, but I still read hunting magazines. I also like to watch the hunting shows on tv.

     My little girl finds this just awful, killing "Bambi" and all of that. So, out of respect for her, I no longer watch the hunting shows(I still get the mags.). So, last winter, my oldest girl and her husband bring over some deer meat, already cooked.

      Well, the youngest girl gets a whiff of it, and just digs in! After staring at each other like idiots, we decide I should tell her that it is deer meat, venison. OK, so I tell her, "Honey, that is deer meat". She looks at me for a second, then starts to cry...but she is STILL EATING!!

      She hated that the deer was killed, but she LOVED the meat! Now she tells me one of her friends is bringing  deer meat hamburgers to school for a party tomorrow. I told her she didn't have to go. To which she replied; "Are you crazy, I want a deer-burger"!!!

       Therefore, I am asking if GreenPeace comes in maybe a lighter shade???  Have fun with your kids, they leave home FAR too quickly...........even if they are quirky!

Monday, December 6, 2004


  Why am I here? It is a question as old as mankind, yet it has never been answered.  We live our lives, most of us manage to have a couple kids, maybe do some charity work, and make a few friends along the way. Then we die, and get shoved down a six-foot hole, covered by dirt. A fitting end? Hardly.

       But then, there are others; the Mother Theresa's, the Alexander Grahm Bells, the Ben Franklins, The Abraham Lincolns---people who actually make a difference in the world. They get the same as the rest of us. A hard life, then a hole in the ground. "We are born to die" as the old saying goes.  Why?

      Why do millions die in wars, thousands are wiped-out in natural disasters, hundreds are killed at the hands of man-made machines! And yet we continue to come into this world, one after another, forever. Is this the work of your God? To promise you the gift of life, but put limitations on it?

     If none of this makes any sense to you, then welcome to my world. None of it makes any sense to me.

Friday, December 3, 2004

What I Want---

 "Just what do you want, oh wise one"? I want a beer. A BEER...not some 'light' crap, or something with 'less carbs', just a freakin' beer! Schiltz, Pabst Blue Ribbon. Michelobe, Falstaff...all of the old beers you can't find anymore. MEN DO NOT drink "Zima". Little pussy yuppies do, not men.

    I want a cup of coffee. NOT this cafe` latte` shit, with all of the foam, sprinkles, and crap that goes with it. I just want and hot! Not iced, french,(Irish is ok!!), espresso, whatever....JUST COFFEE!

    I want to know about the "in-field fly rule". Get rid of it. While you are at it, get rid of that damn "in the park" homerun! Bullshit! Let these over-paid, steroid abusing, "so-called" atheletes EARN RUNS. Do you believe Barry Bonds? Can we? First it was cork-filled bats, and now, steroids. It seems to me the only thing Bonds does well is get caught lying!!

      I want postal workers who will actually *smile*!  That's right, if the folks at Wal-Mart can do it, then postal workers can too! And, explain something to me. The post office constantly says that they recieve NO federal funding...but if they piss you off with their *smug-assed* attitude, you can say nothing, if you do, it can carry FEDERAL charges??? Who came up with that shit? It's OK for them to go nuts and shoot a few co-workers, but you can't say anything when they are shit-faced with you(that would be always!).

    I want people to quit smoking. Today marks ONE YEAR without a cigarette for me.  Please, hold your applause, I will sign autographs in the back. (LOL) Let me tell ya', it has not been as bad as I thought it would. PLUS, I have learned some useful things along the way. If you are ready to quit, I can tell you where to find support. Hell, just write to me with the subject heading; Want to Quit. I'll help you myself, if need be!

      I want decent clothes, made in America. NOT in some "Kathy Lee", or "Martha Stewart" sweat-shop in Malaysia, the Phillipines, or Korea. These people rarely grow to over five(5) feet tall! Stop making my clothes to either fit YOUR tiny society, or YOUR overblown IDEA of what Americans look like!!

     I want more, and BETTER rights for victims of violent crimes, or crimes of abuse! Fuck a criminal's "rights". If you are shown to be guilty, you get one appeal. If later it is found that an over zealous DA decided YOU were going to be their lap-dog, then I want these assholes locked up too....preferably WITH the person they did wrong to. That  should stop a lot of this shit that goes on in court-rooms these days. And, oh yeah, make the judges culpable, too.

       These are just SOME of the things I want, well and world peace, too. But that ain't gonna happen. So, just hand me a P.B.R. and shut the fuck up!   Later, Kids!


Thursday, December 2, 2004

New Poem---(I think)

**********************I've Been Around Forever*******************   I've been around forever, you see, Listen to the rest, then you'll believe. I was there as Jesus died, I watched as his mother cried. And glorious old Satan, in his nest, I never gave that fool no rest! I've seen millions die from war and starvation I've watched the rise and fall of nations!   So when you step to me, You had better come correct- I'll tear out your heart, and snap your neck. You might think you are "bad", maybe even a little tough, Shut up and listen, you haven't heard enough!   I was there when Cain killed Abel, Think you can shock me? Just put your cards on the table! You say I am cold, and it is true, Leave me, before your time is through!   I have seen the 'phony tough' and the 'crazy brave', Hell, I laughed as I danced on their graves! I have been here forever, you see, Read it again, then you will believe!

Tuesday, November 30, 2004


     Can the wind recall the names it has carried in the past?

      Can it recall, and bring them back?

       The wind can remember all that it has borne,

        The happy, the sad, the joyful, and the forelorn.


           Yes, it can remember, but cannot bring them back,

             What's gone is gone, what's past, is past.

            For the wind is a beast, not easily tamed,

            But the wind, it will never know my name.


            By: John F. Goodson, Jr.    Nov. 30, 2004

Saturday, November 27, 2004

"When Doves Cry".

  I never really knew what those words meant. I recently found out exactly what they of my "doves" was crying. Sadly, I didn't catch it in time, and this little "dove" was possibly harmed for a long time. I seem to learn every day that NO-ONE is to be trusted, EVER.

       I will tend to my little "dove", but I will also deal with the one who has hurt my little "dove". My "dove" can be healed, I am not so sure of the person who hurt the "dove".......

      Untill next we speak....keep a close eye on all your little "doves".


Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Too Busy!!

Sorry, children. I am rather busy these next few days, so I give you permission to run around and act crazy untill I get time to bring everyone up to speed. Happy Thanksgiving...Save a Turkey...Eat Ham!!! (or beaver!!)

Monday, November 22, 2004

The Truth

  To find out more for yourself, and to draw your own conclusions, please go here;

      You need to see this.


  OK, I spent the day in town with my wife. We had a lovely day, and got along swimmingly. So, enough of that fairy tale, we always get along. BUT, I saw something that TOTALLY disgusted me. And that ain't easy.

    We were headed into one of the stores to shop, there was a "man" outside, ringing a bell for the Salvation Army. No biggie, it's that time of year. I looked at this guy, right in his eyes, because he was damn sure lookin' at me. This was not a nice person. You could tell if you just looked past his exterior....I have seen his type before; so have you.

  You know the drill....haggard looking, hasn't shaved in a week, greasy hair, smelly, and he reeked of alcohol. Stay with me....As we were standing there, waiting to go in, he spots a young girl with three(3) small children(the oldest couldn't have been much over 4 years old). He called to her...not once, but three (3) times. She actually went to him.

      Never mind the fact that they knew nothing of one-another, forget the fact that he might be a criminal, forget the fact that he is obviously an alcoholic....she walked right up to him with those three children!  The FIRST statement out of his mouth was..."Don't you have someone to spend the holidays with"? (he couldn't see the three children???)

       Here is where it gets REALLY STUPID. This girl starts acting very "coy", and answering his questions! I saw a mother of three small children actually go into what I call "school-girl mode". I couldn't believe it! We finally went in to the store, but not before I had already seen far too much!

       It should be legal to go up and kick someone in the ass when they are doing something STUPID!! If this "girl" wants to place herself in a bad position with what is an obvious predator, fine, go for it. But, I have to wonder how much those children will suffer because their mom wants a quick lay.

       Think about what you do. Do you REALLY want another generation of people like me? Do you even realize that I WILL NOT shake hands with people I haven't met before? Did you know that I do not hug people?? I find it repulsive. I don't "high-five" with people. And NO ONE touches me. Only my wife, daughters, and grand-children get to do that. It comes from a TOTAL lack of trust for others.

     People tell me you can't go through life without human contact. I seem to do just fine without it. If I could just stay at home, I would be fine. If I go out, I am on constant alert, never missing ANYTHING. How could this girl not have some type of "radar", or something, to keep her safe?? How can people be so stupid, maybe "ignorant" is a better word for it??

Friday, November 19, 2004

World Domination??

  It would seem that the "Bush War Machine" just keeps on rolling merrily along, thanks to all of you dick-heads who voted for him! Now, the machine has turned it's eye toward Iran, with an ever more threatening look.

     Did I miss something here? Am I the only one to notice that Mr. Bush's cabinet is jumping ship faster than rats on a sinking boat? You don't quit the cabinet AFTER your man wins the election....WTF???

     Is any of this sinking into your collective thick heads?? And now, Mr. Bush wants to challenge China? Has he forgotten that we had our ass handed to us back in the early 50's, over in Korea? And now, he wants to take over, or at least try to intimidate China, no less?  Can he say, Vietnam??

      I damn sure can! I had an uncle over there! I can remember being the only six (6) year old on my block that actually watched the evening news, EVERYDAY,  just to see the soldiers on tv! I always hoped I would see my uncle. I never did, but he did come home alive; if you could call it "living".

        Did we learn nothing from the Russians in the mid-east in the eighties? They got THEIR ASSES handed to them, also. Somewhere in a little country called Afghanistan....ring any bells?

        We are in another Vietnam, and Mr. Bush wants to make it a "multi-faceted-war". Some asshole, back in 2001, decided to give Mr. Bush **FULL CONTROL** of ALL decisions made  in this country. He now has more power than ANY American president to date!

     I just can't say this enough times; "WAKE THE FUCK UP"!!!!!!! On another note, do you even KNOW how many innocent civillians have died in Afghanistan, and Iraq? Rolled over by Bush's war machine! You don't care, because they are mid-eastern? Think about how angry YOU were on Sept. 11, 2001. Multiply that times 10,000. That is how much THEY hate US!

        Hate cuts both ways. Do you buy that shit they are feeding you on the news services? That all of these people were just waiting for "America" to come and save them? Have you NEVER heard of the Armed forces "big-wigs" staging these things??  Again, I ask, can you say Vietnam?

     Everyone wanted revenge for Sept. 11, 2001. Has killing ANY of these people brought back even ONE of the Americans that were lost on that day? Has it? Is the loss of countless U.S. soldiers worth this so-called "revenge"?  NO.

         "Revenge is a dish best served cold". I always viewed this statement to mean wait, cool down, and figure out your options BEFORE you take action. NO ONE has done this in this case!

    If you keep sticking your head in the sand, then WHO will watch your ass? Of course, YOU trust George W. Bush to keep it safe...........dumbass.

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Where are the "Men In Black"???

  Well, well, I am back, kids! I managed to survive another day!! Now, I know that just pisses someone off, somewhere! I love bringin' you the straight skinny on things, you already know this, so now I have a question for YOU...the reader!

    Think about this for a few minutes; I have taken a LOT of pot-shots at our government, especially one George Bush, Jr. Now, I know that I am realitivly unknown in the world, and I like that. But, I have noticed people who investigate UFOs, and are even less noteworthy (if that's possible), than me, get arrested, computers confiscated, and their homes ransacked on a routine basis!  (wait, I am getting there)

  Now, if you have been reading this entire journal, you KNOW that I said before that the gov't uses mis-direction to keep people guessing about UFOs. (if you DON'T know this, then shut-up, and pay attention!)

  Could it be POSSIBLE, nay, even PLAUSIBLE, that our gov't makes "examples" out of these UFO nuts(no offense, guys), but leaves people like me alone, because they WANT you to believe in UFOs???  I mean, these guys aren't poking at the gov't per-se, the gov't just happens to get in the way sometimes.

    What would you consider MORE important? A person who spreads dissent, and mistrust in the gov't(possibly, ME??), or some nut watching the skies for something that never existed? I would be inclined to "keep an eye" out for the  former. But, that's just me!

     As much as I have poked at the Federal Gov't, you would think that John Ashcroft himself would be pounding on my door! Instead, they go after these guys who watch for proof of UFOs.

      Let me get this straight....the FBI can find some "crack-pot" out in the south-west dessert area of the U.S., all alone in some 30 foot long trailer, and they can't even find Bin Laden?? They spent 17 years trying to find the Uni-Bomber, for criminy sakes!!

    There IS a cover-up here, but it is not what you think. The cover is that the Gov't simply wants you looking the wrong way, while they develop MORE weapons, MORE ways to kill people, and MORE and BETTER ways to decieve the American People!

     WAKE UP!!! Dammit, people, stop just "assuming" that everything is OK!! It Isn't! It hasn't been for a very LOOONNNGGG time! The terroist threat? There isn't one! Just morePROPAGANDA to keep you afraid, and in line.

       Maybe if the U.S. stopped trying to police the entire world, or stopped trying to tell other countries how to live. Here is a great idea, get the hell out of Israel! Stop funding their attacks against Palastine.  They may have needed our help at one time, but not now. If a palastinian blows up himself in Israel, everyone goes nuts, Palastine is the "bad guys".

       But, if Israel attacks innocent civillians in Palastine, then that is OK. What the hell is that about? And I want the head of the ASSHOLE who decided that Yassir Arafat should have recieved the Nobel Peace Prize!! The biggest terrorist of his time, and he recieves the  Nobel Peace Prize....look again, the key words were "Peace Prize". Do you know what an Oxymoron is??  Anybody?

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

A Fine Line?

  Good evening, my children. Someone commented that all geniuses are a little crazy. Almost correct; "There is a very fine line between Genius, and complete insanity". That's the way I heard it years ago, anyway.

       "A fine line"?? Hmmm, seems that I play on both sides  of that line. That is not intended to state, or even infer, that I, in any way, am a genius! LOL It does, however, infer, or state, that I can go from complete lucidity, to the very depths of the sublime. Confused? Welcome to MY WORLD.

      Well, there goes the rest of my entry. My wife just came in and started playing in my hair(I have a VERY LONG ponytail). Complete and utter distraction! AND, she is showing off her legs to me!!

      Sorry, kids, I'll catch you tomorrow...wink....wink!!!

Tuesday, November 16, 2004


  There seems to be some confusion over yesterday's entry. Or, maybe it just shows the different ways different people can relate to things. What I wrote came from ME, not any doctor.  The doctor I saw last Tuesday, only gave me an "assessment". Then he made an appointment for six weeks after that. He didn't actually tell me anything, except that he was prepared to put me into the hospital, to help me "conform"----yeah, right.

      You see, a doctor's "concern" for his /her patients is only as deep as their next payment on that new Jaguar XK-7. I know this, and am not fooled by a nice smile, and some kind words. Hell, I could pull THAT off!

   I do not merely "accept" things as they are, I question EVERYTHING, and always will. As to my writing??? Just chalk it up to me being me....that's all that I can be. Sometimes I get down, and stay that way for a few days, that is my world. BUT, like I said, after awhile, I get back on top.

  As far as "getting tired of riding this roller-coaster", wouldn't you? This up-and-down shit has gone on for my entire life! Like I stated before..."little Johnny is broke, I doubt he can ever be fixed". Maybe, just because of that fact, that is how I get most of my ideas?????????

Monday, November 15, 2004


  Depression...what is that like?? Just imagine if someone parked a fully loaded 10 ton dump-truck on your chest, then told you to escape. But you must escape RIGHT NOW, and do it quietly, so you don't disturb the "normals" around you. (I don't call you "normals", I prefer "Mundanes")

     Now, free yourself from this crushing weight, NOW, get with it, you don't want to be "different". You MUST conform, be "well-adjusted", normal, like everyone else. Everyone screaming at you to conform, not letting up. But wait, just give it a few days, and you will be on cloud nine!!

      It is like being drunk with power...everything is funny, everyone likes you, you just can't lose......then, someone parks that damn truck back on top of you. Welcome to my world....a land that is completely foriegn to you "Mundanes".

      I think that I am tired of riding this roller-coaster.

The Human Mind---or lack thereof...

 Ahhh, I see some of my children are still with me; good. For today's lesson, let us look deep into that lump  of grey-matter we loosely call "the human mind". A  non-descript organ, about 2 1/2 to 3 pounds of lumps, with small, electrical charges running all over it. Very easily "fried" when hooked to a large electrical current!

     We go through life with this lump in our skulls, some say it makes each individual who they are. It is strange, but in childhood, it seems(for the most part) to function OK. Then we "grow up". Just when you were skating through this mess that we call "life", with little, or no trouble, the damn thing goes haywire on you!

     It is suddenly like everything has been wired up by a blind man. Everything you knew, just sort of gives way to a "new reality", a reality that has nothing to do with being "real" any longer.  This doesen't seem to happen to everyone---those people who are "unaffected" want to tell those who are affected just what is wrong; for $200.00 an hour!

    You see, it happened to me. Some say from being abused as a child....some say from my time in a motorcycle gang when I was young. Some even say that some of the things that my mother did when I was young was "sexual abuse". You got me...I'm not an "expert".

      I think I know just when I "broke"? Stopped caring...just didn't give a damn, whatever. I think it was somewhere around the 50th beating from my mom. You know, the really good ones, where she took a large leather belt, and hit your bare legs until she cut you open and  you would bleed all night. That might have been it. Or, maybe it WAS with the bikers, maybe around the fourth, or fifth biker I saw lying on the pavement, bleeding to death from wounds inflicted by guns, knives, or crashes??

      I guess we will never quite know just when little johnny "broke". But we DO know one terrible thing.....little johnny can't be fixed!  Sleep well........sleep LIGHTLY.

Friday, November 12, 2004

A Simple Man, with a Simple Plan

  "A simple man, with a simple plan".  I can hear you now---"what the hell is that about?"  I just thought that if some of you have not started at the beginning of this journal, then you would not know who I am.

    I am just that, a simple man. But, I can be very complex at times. How can I be complex? If I knew the answer to that, then I might not have to go see a shrink!  I don't like change, at all! This past Tuesday, this new doctor offered to put me in the hospital. I declined, I told him there were too many "nuts" there.

     You see, I don't do well with other people, especially those that I have no knowledge of. Call it fear of the unknown, but with me, it is more of a "control issue". I do not like situations where I have no control over what happens next (if anyone can ever have ANY control of anything, I think it is more of an illusion to placate our fears).

    I am just a person who wants nothing more than to be left alone----yet, I come here and post all of the time?? A human paradox if ever I saw one! That's me, simple, yet complex. I can't even understand MYSELF, how can someone else ever HOPE to understand me?

    A comet that burns brightly, yet stays hidden behind the moon, so no one can see. Dark and light, Yin and Yang, Good and Bad. How does it all fit together, to make a whole? I guess we will never know, at least , not in this life.

       Have a good weekend, my children. Be safe, but most of all, be cool!!

Wednesday, November 10, 2004


     Well, now, something has come up, here in the pages of what I loosely call my life. Seems someone was called "white-trash" by someone else. Hmmmm, I am not about to get into that one, but it got me to thinking...labels, and how we "aquire" them.

   Now, take me for example...I am ;abeled as "biker", because of my back-ground, and the way I dress, and look, and talk, and view things. Other people see that I live in a large trailer, and say "white trash". Still others see me as a "redneck". And, others see me as a "bully", because I look mean, and don't talk to people when I am out.....hmmmm.

    Now, the way I see it, I AM a biker, a veteran(army), a dad, and a grandfather, husband, Uncle, Son-in-law, and cousin(or "cuz" as we say). So, it seems that even I have labels for me. Wild, huh? It gets better....... Doctors call me "heart-patient, schizophrenic, bi-polar, manic-depressive, "post-traumatic-stressed", and some things that I could NEVER hope to spell!

    At my favorite web-site, I am "administrator", to my wife, I am "husband", "provider", "lover", "friend". To my children and grandchildren, I am "dad", "protector", and "a pretty cool guy to know".

     To my close neighbors, I am "quiet", "strange", "very probabally mean". What was that, about 20 some labels for just one guy? Most of those are correct, some not, but that is OK. I wear the one label that ALL of us wear constantly----HUMAN.  

      Now, go play with some "labels" yourself. And are free to continue your feudin'.

Just Another Manic Monday--------(not really)

   I know, I know, it is not Monday. Shut up! I know what day it is! I just feel like that old 80's song..."Just Another Manic Monday", by the Bangles?? Someone correct that if it is wrong, and I think it is.

   What today? Not much, as it is only about noon-thirty here. Half a day gone, and I have done NOTHING productive. Well, I did post on our new web-site, and sent out welcome letters to new members. I DID manage to haul my ass out of bed today, so I guess that accounts for something.

      I sat outside last week, late one evening, and said goodbye to summer once again. I have seen 44 of them come and go. Some of those summers hold LOTS of memories---actually, ALL of them hold SOME memories. I cannot remember ever having a bad summer.

      Here's an idea just for today. No matter your age, who you are, how much you have(or don't have), stop for a few minutes, and recall your BEST summer ever, to date. I bet it brings a smile to your face, if only for a second. Try it, and remember to do this often. Or, get out there, and make some NEW memories!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 9, 2004

Another One???

   Wake up!! I am here, and ready to rock-n-roll!!  My local doc sent me to a "new" shrink! They confirmed my worst fears----I'M CRAZY!!!!!!!!!  I have to go back in about six weeks to see what this joker comes up with??  Here's a clue---my mother was insane, so was HER mother, chances are pretty good that I am a NUT also!!! See, I did that all by myself, and didn't need eight(8) years of college to figure it out!  What a bunch of dumb-fucks! Shrinks are like fortune-tellers; they listen a little, and tell you all the obvious shit that you already know!!  Jerk-offs! They even wanted to put me in the hospital TODAY!!

      Now, I ask you, how the HELL can I bug people if I am locked down???  I AM CHAOS.....I MUST REIGN FOR NOW!  Ain't it cool??

Sunday, November 7, 2004

It's HERE!!!! It's HERE!!!

  I just thought some of you needed to see I said, I expose Gov't. lies when I can!!


Subject: The 2005 Draft (Men and Women) 18-26
>Dear all,
>I just received this email from a friend. I thought that you might want to
>about this.
>Mandatory draft for boys and girls (ages 18-26) starting June 15, 2005, is
>something that everyone should know about. This literally effects everyone
>we all have or know children that will have to go if this bill passes.
>There is pending legislation in the house and senate (companion bills: S89
>HR 163) which will time the program's initiation so the draft can begin as
>as spring, 2005, just after the 2004 presidential election. The
>is quietly trying to get these bills passed now, while the public's
>attention is
>on the elections, so our action on this is needed immediately. Details and
>follow. This plan, among other things, eliminates higher education as a
>and includes women in the draft. Also, crossing into Canada has already
>been made very difficult.
>Please send this on to all the parents and teachers you know, and all the
>and uncles, grandparents, godparents. . .
>And let your children know - - it's their future, and they can be a
>voice for change!
>This legislation is called
>HR 163
>and can be found in detail l at this website:
>Just enter in "HR 163" and click search and will bring up the bill for you
>read. It is less than two pages long.
>If this bill passes, it will include all men and ALL WOMEN from ages 18 -
>26 in
>a draft for military action. In addition,
>college will no longer be an option
>for avoiding the draft
>and they will be signing an
>agreement with the Canada which will no longer
>permit anyone attempting to dodge the draft to stay within it's borders.
>bill also includes the extension of military service for all those that are
>currently active. If you go to the select service web site and read their
>FYI Goals you will see that the reasoning for this is to increase the size
>the military in case of terrorism. This is a critical piece of legislation,
>will effect our undergraduates, our children and our grandchildren.
>Please take the time to write your congressman and let them know how you
>about this legislation.
>Please also write to your representatives and ask them why they aren't
>their constituents about these bills and write to newspapers and other
>outlets to ask them why they're not covering this important story.
>The draft $28 million has been added to the 2004 selective service system
>to prepare for a military draft that could start as early as June 15, 2005.
>Selective service must report to Bush on March 31, 2005 that the system,
>has lain dormant for decades, is ready for activation.
>Please see
>to view the Selective Service System
>annual performance plan, fiscal year 2004.
>The pentagon has quietly begun a public campaign to fill all 10,350 draft
>positions and 11,070 appeals board slots nationwide. Though this is an
>election year topic, military experts and influential members of congress
>suggesting that if Rumsfeld's prediction of a "long, hard slog" in Iraq and
>Afghanistan (and permanent state of war on terrorism) proves accurate, the
>may have no choice but to draft.
>entitled the Universal National service Act of 2003, "to provide for the
>defense by requiring that all young persons (age 18-26) in the United
>including women, perform a period of military service or a period of
>service in furtherance of the national defense and homeland security, and
>other purposes." Th ese active bills
>currently sit in the committee on armed services. Dodging the draft will be
>difficult than those from the Vietnam era. College and Canada will not be
>options. In December, 2001, Canada and the U.S. signed a "smart border
>declaration," which could be used to keep would-be draft dodgers in. Signed
>Canada's minister of foreign
>affairs, John Manley, and U.S. Homeland Security director, Tom Ridge, the
>declaration involves a 30 point plan which implements, among other things,
>"pre-clearance agreement" of people entering and departing each country.
>aimed at making the draft more equitable along gender and class lines also
>eliminates higher
>education as a shelter. Underclassmen would only be able to postpone
>until the end of their current semester. Seniors would have until the end
>of the
>academic year.
>What to do: Tell your friends, Contact your legislators and ask them to oppose these bills Just type "congress" into the aol search engine and input your zip code. A list of your reps will pop up with a way to email them directly. We can't just sit and pretend that by ignoring it, it will go away. We must voice our concerns and create the world we want to live in for our children and grandchildren.

Saturday, November 6, 2004

Blog, Blog, Blog-----

   Sorry, guys. Today is Saturday, and there is nothing going on, plus I am having lots of pain in my left arm. It is just over a year since I had my first "light" heart-attack. Someone define "light" for me???

       I have been shot, cut, never stabbed(but not for lack of someone always trying!!LOL), I've been run over by assorted machinery, and animals, fallen off of far more than anyone ever should, and I cannot recall a pain as bad as a "light" heart-attack.

    So, as the kids say(or used to say), I am just chillin' wit' the homies!  Have a  good weekend everyone, and remember, If you can't laugh at yourself, then someone else will be glad to do it for you.

Friday, November 5, 2004

Bullies---(you will love this!)

  Good day to all my peeps! Guys, girls, undecideds, whoever you are!  Welcome to one  and all!! Settle down in the back, I see ya'. And for goodness's sake, quit eating those damn chips at your 'puter, it gets the keys all oily!! Now, what was the subject.....oh, yeah, BULLIES.

     Here is a little known fact--in the first grade, a kid beat me up when I was walking home(it was the sixties, we could walk home back then). No big deal, right? Well, he did this EVERYDAY---up to the third grade!  I hated fighting, but I didn't like getting beat up, either.

   One day, my stepdad decided to pick me up at school. I have no idea why, he showed little or no interest before that. Anyway, he gets there late, so he found this kid(who was bigger than me), beating the shit outta me. I thought, great, finally some help. My stepdad was 6' 6" tall, and weighed in around 400 pounds. Big, dumb, and mean, a truck driver.

      He snatched me up from that hell on earth, and took me home. I was soo proud of him at that moment....but fate is a cruel, cold-hearted bitch. My stepdad beat the shit out of me right then and there, and my mother joined in. I was betrayed,and, it seems, I had committed an affront to them that was socially unacceptable! I was actually beaten up in public. This would not stand!

    After spending most of the night as a punching bag for my stepdad, I was allowed to sleep for a couple of hours, then sent to school, with just ONE condition; I was to hunt down that boy, and hurt him. I did. I had only been at school for about two minutes when he came walking up the sidewalk.

      I jumped him right there. At first, he just laughed. But then it got ugly, and I did more damage than ANY third-grade child should EVER be allowed to. No one stopped me, they continued to let me kick this boy in the head, and anywhere else I could. He was crying at first, then he fell silent, and someone pulled me away. It was not never will be.

        Something inside me snapped that day. I knew no one would ever pick on me again, I would see to that personally. The other boy? He only ended up with a small concussion. Did he bother me again? Yes, just a few days later, and he got the same. Then the roles were reversed. I was once timid, and would try to run from him....not anymore. Now, I did the chasing, AND the beating!

       The point of all of this? As you read this, one would be tempted to be mad at the other kid, because he was a bully. Now, read it again, and pay attention this time. The REAL bully here is the stepdad. I thought he would help me. I was wrong, and never made that mistake again.

      Bullies now? Well, they come in a different form, as I recently learned. Bullies nowadays can even be young, spoiled little girls with computers, and waaaaayyyy too much time on their hands.


           Now Play Nice with each Other!!

Thursday, November 4, 2004

Not Gloating....

 Welcome my children, to the show that never ends!!  How are all of you today?  Shut up---it was a rhetorical question!!! If you have problems, Email me with them, don't tell it here!! Damn, I love my job!! "But, please, oh wise and mighty Dragon Master, what IS your job"?  Ahhh, it has come to that, has it???  Welllllll.........

       My job is to point out Gov't lies, Corporate lies, any deciet going on in the world right now. Aliens? You better be worried about Earth-bound aliens for now, brothers!!  My job is to pick at the festering scabs of the world as we know it, and to make them open up, to become infected with that most vile of ALL diseases,  TRUTH!!!  There is no cure for TRUTH!!

       And on that note, my little turtle is konfuzed, and cannot "chirp" anymore---looks like I need to put it down, and just walk away. Don't worry if you don't get it, the right people most certainly will! Or not--you know what I say, "fuck 'em and feed 'em fish-heads"!!

     "But, Dragon Master, is that ALL that you do"? Most certainly not! I also take up for the under-dog, the little guy who gets stepped on in society. I have been an "outlaw" all of my life. Even in my home as a child. I have been the "under-dog" many times, but I got over it, and decided to stand on my own two feet!  "I will die on my feet before I will serve on my knees"!!

    Suffering from a GOD complex? I don't think so...unlike GOD, I am HERE, and I actually get involved! The belief that there is a "Supreme Being" that oversees everything is just preposturous. Ask the 6 million Jewish people who died in WWII---oh, wait, they are DEAD!  See my point? If you read that the wrong way, then go back to school, I AM NOT anti sematic.

       So, what was the point of today's rant?? I feel like stirring up some trouble. Surely by now, most of you KNOW just how my SICK mind works!!! If you don't, then please, climb aboard the "Train of lost thought". We have room for anyone who just wants the truth from this shitty world of "damage control", "spin artists",  "half-truths", and whatever else people decice to call  LYING!

        By the way, bush won---geez, who DIDN'T see that coming?????????  Now, go stir up some trouble yourself, I amtoo busy with mine to help you!!!  I love being an asshole sometimes!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 2, 2004


     I never threatened anyone on the site, I merely told that person that I would hand deliver ALL of their posts to their home!  THIS IS MY PAGE!  You DO NOT come here and malign had better wake up and look around.  I am not a person you want to make mad. Maybe your bosses need to see some of the letters you have written to me???

     Maybe they need to know just how you ban people from a site for specific reasons, but continue to let two people CONTINUE to break the rules?? Maybe you should look at Fishee's ADVERTISING on the site---clearly against the rules!!  Maybe you should see someone about "PULLING YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS!!!!!!!


        And for anyone else who reads this, Marc Meyers works for Smoke Away corp. They make a good product, they just have lousy employees!!!!!!!

         Also, if you would like to contact Mr. Meyers with suggestions on just HOW to recover his head from his ass, then, by all means, try these..............         

Marc Meyer emersondirect 239-449-2607 239-594-2562-fax 412-901-8456-cell               I am sure that Mr. Meyers would LOVE to hear from you---------ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!  Delete that, Marc!

Not Finished Yet---

    So, anyone out there need a fresh, witty, no-holds-barred Moderator? Someone who is NOT afraid to speak the truth? Someone who will always fight the "establishment" for the truth? Someone who will ALWAYS fight for the "underdog" out there?

       Don't be shy! Personal photos are available upon request.



      I reserve the right to reject any or all offers if I deem so neccessary.

The Puzzle

   You know something, life is like a puzzle. One of those really big-ass puzzles, like a thousand pieces or so. You land on this shitty little rock one day, and the next, someone throws all of these pieces at you, and then says "solve the puzzle".

       What they never tell you is that LOTS of key pieces are missing..........................................................................


    For "mood" I put frustrated...not an accurate description, really.  "PISSED OFF" sounds better.  You see, I broke my own rules, and had a couple of "friends". For now, let's just call them "Biggest Ass", and "Killjoy". You see, I learned very early in life that "friends" are the first to fuck you over. I guess some things never change!

   You would think after 44  years of surviving the absolute worst that this shitty world can throw at someone, I should know better!  Geez, I got screwed, and didn't even get dinner or a thank you! I have worked tirelessly for 11 months on a certain website(no names, at least I have SOME integrity, even if they don't), for free. That's right, no pay, and I was a sucker for doing it.

          After being publicly humiliated by these two "friends", I quit the site. I wasn't mean about it, I just quit.  Others quit right along with me, but the "friends" decided to delete my posts BEFORE anyone else saw them!! Now I have confused people asking me what is happening, and they are quitting the site as well. Seems more people like me than I even knew.

       At this point, I should do  or say something gracious, maybe "please, don't quit the site just because I did". Yeah, right. Fuck that....quit in DROVES!! You are being lied to! They are keeping information from you!! I even had my account frozen, so I could NOT post that I quit!!  I can't even go back in and delete the over 2,000 posts that I have made these past 11 months!

        "Big Brother" is everywhere, people. Even on a simple little free website! Don't get sucked in by having "friends", they are the first to stab you with the "Dagger of Betrayal". I have always said "keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer", looks like I should re-think that advice.......

      Oh, yeah, for those who know......."chirp, chirp?? CHIRP CHIRP, DAMMIT, CHIIIRRRPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, October 28, 2004

"We Don't Need No Stinking Badges"!!

  Below, you will find something a close friend sent to me. This person has heard me tell them what lies will come from the White House for the last five (5) years. In EVERY instance I have been right. Hey, it ain't braggin if you are actually right. In this day and time, PLEASE don't trust your Gov't. to tell you ANY truth. THAT little "oversight" will almost certainly get you killed. 

 I thought that everyone needed a heads up. As far as I can tell, this is authentic. I say if you live in highly populated areas, please be on your guard. No one ever said the next attack would be centered in N.Y.   In these times when our Government sticks it's head in the sand, and spends far too much time "pointing fingers", we need all of the info that we can get.  Enjoy----





In the last week before the election, ABCNEWS is holding a videotaped message from a purported al Qaeda terrorist warning of a new attack on America, the DRUDGE REPORT has learned.

The terrorist claims on tape the next attack will dwarf 9/11. "The streets will run with blood," and "America will mourn in silence" because they will be unable to count the number of the dead. Further claims: America has brought this on itself for electing George Bush who has made war on Islam by destroying the Taliban and making war on Al Qaeda.

ABCNEWS strongly denies holding the tape back from broadcast over political concerns during the last days of the election.

The CIA is analyzing the tape, a top federal source tells the DRUDGE REPORT.

ABCNEWS obtained the tape from a source in Waziristan, Pakistan over the weekend, sources tells DRUDGE.

"We have been working 24 hours a day trying to authenticate [the tape]," a senior ABCNEWS source said Wednesday morning, dismissing a claim that ABC was planning to air portions of the video during Monday's WORLD NEWS TONIGHT.

The terrorist's face is concealed by a headdress, and he speaks in an American accent, making it difficult to identify the individual.

US intelligence officials believe the man on tape may be Adam Gadhan - aka Adam Pearlman, a California native who was highlighted by the FBI in May as an individual most likely to be involved in or have knowledge of the next al Qaeda attacks.

According to the FBI, Gadahn, 25, attended al-Qaida training camps and served as an al-Qaida translator.

The disturbing tape runs an hour -- the man simply identifies himself as 'Assam the American.'


The video appears to be from al-Qaeda's media liaison organization. It has a banner crediting the Sahab Production Committee. The speaker refers to Bin Ladin and Zawahiri as "our leaders" and praises the 11 September attacks. The video appears to have been made in the past several months based on the speaker's discussion of the conflict in Darfur, the 9/11 Commission and other recent events


Filed By Matt Drudge

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

"The Battle Has Begun"!!!

Well, well, it has begun. Our battle started at about 7:30 pm, edst tonight. Or, 19:30 for you types who like to tell time the same way as I do. This will not be a battle of attrition----I will lose NONE of my troops.

     I find it completely ....I'm not sure I have a decent word for it.....stupid? Idiotic? That we even had to resort to such tactics, but since it has begun, let the chips fall where they may.

      We will be victorious!!

Sunday, October 24, 2004

A Plan of Attack is in Motion

    I have put into motion a plan for some very annoying people!  I have informed my "troops" that if all goes bad, then I, and only I, will take full responsibility!  No one else need suffer because of my plan.  


     Why put it here? Because I need something for my "troops" to fall back on, in case I am not heard after the "Battle" is over with. My "troops" know how much I care for them. I would do anything to keep them safe, but we lost one of our "Troops" recently, and many grieve for him. His name was Bob, and he was a true man, a just man, and would always be straight with a person, even if you didn't like it!    


      My "troops" know I don't like to put them in harm's way, but I am hoping that they will stand with me on this "battle". Everyone of my "troops" knows to find me here if I am lost in the "battle". I hope they understand, even if I am lost in the "battle", this had to be finished, once-and-for-all!    


       Good Luck, my "troops". I hope to "see" you when the fog of war is over!!!  Vive` Le Revolution!!!!!

Saturday, October 23, 2004

Alien Abductions----

  Ha, Ha!!  I can write any old way I want to!!!!  To hell with your rules...I do things MY WAY!! As for today's subject..."Alien Abductions", let's take a practical approach to this "problem"!!  

     First, and most important of all, I have NEVER been abducted...ever. I spend LOTS of time outside at night, watching the skies, and looking at the stars. I have seen planes, jets, helos, even ducks and geese, late in the evening, but so far, no "starships". I find this to be very strange.      If all of these people are being "abducted", then shouldn't we see more positive proof. Something more than shaky videos, and "regression therapy", that is even more shaky than the videos?? It is kind of like "ghost hunting"--pointless, and a waste of time!

     Why is it that "Aliens" only pick up people who write books, or people that "just happen" to know a good writer, or publisher? Wouldn't the "Aliens" be interested in stupid people? I would be...I would want to know about the so-called intelligent life on a planet if I was about to "take over".

       And what is this shit about cutting up cattle all the time?? Let's look closely at that question. If you get a map of the U.S., and do a little homework(i.e. find the locations of "attacks" on cattle), you will see that nearly all, or actually ALL of the "attacks" are in an area that starts out in New Mexico (White sands area ring any bells?), and spreads outward in a circle. Further homework (weather charts) will also show that the "attacks" follow the wind patterns as well.

      What does all of that mean? Your "Aliens" are nothing more than the U.S. Government testing cattle for radiation fallout, from nuclear testing years ago! Problem solved!  The information is out there, folks, I just try to bring you SOME of it....hopefully, it will STIMULATE your mind, and cause you to question things, not just agree, and accept what other people are telling you!!

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

The Difference Between Men and Women...

  They give you a choice of different type-settings, here, but they all pretty much don't fit my style. I will find a way around that.......I think I have just found a way around all of that! 

   So, the difference between men and youngest daughter came in from school today, hungry as usual. I, and my wife usually have dinner already cooked, and just leave it in the oven for her, because she ALWAYS comes home from school ready to eat.                                Well, today she comes in and finds a cake that my wife baked earlier today, so, she says to me, "hey, dad, can I have some cake?". I am a dad, and mom is gone from home at this particular, I did what any good dad would do, and say, "yes, go ahead!".         Of course, dinner is in the oven, and it is still warm. I can already hear all of the "moms" out there. "Oh no he didn't just do that!". Well, I did, because I am a man, and a mother would never give a child cake before dinner in the evening!!         If you don't see any more entries here, then my wife of 22 years has killed me when she got home! If, after a few days, I am back, then she simply mauled me like a mother bear, and I needed time to recover!          No matter what happens, I did exactly what a dad would have done...I let my little girl have her way, something my wife says I do too much!!!  Be nice to each other....don't make me come over there!!

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Are We There Yet???? (keep repeating)

    Well, it is Tuesday. I have been reading, and thinking...a dangerous combination for me!  Are any of you aware that there is ALREADY controversy in Florida about the Presidential election?? Some grumbling and arguing about the ballots again. Now, tell me again, which state has the Presidents BROTHER as their Governor?? I keep forgetting!

      Could it be....wait for it....FLORIDA??  Get used to seeing this "weasel" for the next four years. I love America...I was born here, I have lived here my entire life. America once stood Proud, stood Tall, and was never pushed around by anyone. Now, well we are seen as the "Bully on the Block".

       If we don't like your policies, we just bomb the shit out of you! Genocide at it's American best!!  Milosevic, from Chechnya, Bosnia, wherever the hell he is from, is on trial for the same "crime" that George Bush is getting away with!  Sad, isn't it?

       Mr. Bush will do whatever it takes to win this election...I don't really like John Kerry, but I fear for his safety with Bush in control. Never happen? Yeah, tell that to John Kennedy.  The constitution states that you MUST be past the age of 36 years, and American-born to run for President of the U.S.  Where does it say that you HAVE to come up with MILLIONS OF DOLLARS to even be considered??

       Equality for ALL citizens????  Don't you believe it, brother! Don't you believe it!

       Now, go play nice with each can bet that I WILL be back!!

Friday, October 15, 2004

Why Play Games?

   How are we today? Yes, I have been away, so shut the hell up and deal with it! Some of you need to be smacked around a little to get you quiet!  I have been totally UN-INSPIRED lately!  Don't ask why, even I can't say why. But, on to the title of this rant....

   As some of you know, I belong to another web-site, where I am a Moderator. We have one member who has logged in under sooo many names, that I need a scorecard to keep up with them. Why? Each time, all of us KNOW it is her. Every time, she comes in with a sad story of human suffering beyond belief! Why? What is wrong with this person? I don't have a clue. Our site is about ONE thing....helping people.

       It just seems wrong that we, as a group, cannot reach out to this person. I cannot BEGIN to know what goes through her mind when she sits down to type. I am totally "stumped" as to how to help her. She just will not have anyone tell her that something is wrong with's everyone else who is wrong!  I could understand this if it were only ONE person saying that something is wrong....but we have over 1,000 members!

         Why the games? The worst that will happen to her is that she will be banned from the site for  being an ass. This does NOT speak to the problems that this person is obviously facing. Surely there is SOMETHING we could do for her? I truly don't have a clue here.

Thursday, September 30, 2004

It's Been Awhile---

     I have returned, my children. I was not able to come here for a bit---personal demons, that sort of thing. I have been very busy, however. My grandchildren come almost daily to visit. I have spent time cleaning out my pc. I have also been VERY busy making, and shipping my jewelry to different parts of the Country.

     Everyone here is fine---my wife fell off of the porch steps last Saturday. I was in the shower, but my youngest daughter was outside with her. She is ok, nothing broken, but boy, is she sore!! She is such a little thing, and fragile(to me, anyway!). I have tried to get her to a doc, but she says she is fine.

     Dove-Hunting season is here!! Actually it starts around the first of September. You can hear shotguns all day, untill last shooting light anyway. Nearly everyone here hunts---I used to, but not anymore. I own two compound bows, and have been testing my skills a little of late. I see that I am still pretty good with both!

      Well, I need to go for now, but I just wanted to catch you up on cool, and stay out of trouble!

                                 THE DRAGON MASTER

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Hello?? Is This Thing Turned On-----

     My, my, my....only ONE response to my last entry---and a girl at that!! That's the problem with people these days---they just don't care anymore. Apathetic--Lazy---Afraid to speak out---who knows, who cares???

       My one and ONLY responder has stated that she likes a spirited DEBATE---not argument, but refreshing!  Someone who can speak rationally about a subject WITHOUT losing their composure---I salute you, TC!!  You know who you are!

        That's all for today, my children....but I shall play nice with each other!!

Thursday, September 16, 2004

The Death of the United States

    Gather 'round, children, as I tell you the sad tale of a strong nation, brought to it's knees by a mad-man. That nation is America. That man is our leader, the president. It was once a proud, Independent Nation, a nation who cowered before no one. All of that ended in January of 2000.

       That's right, our nation bleeds, and it is our soldiers who are paying the high cost---the "Ultimate Price" as the Sergeants called it when I was in. If the flat-out attack on Afghanistan wasn't enough, Our President then decides to attack Iraq. We were lied to so that attack could happen!! How do I know that we were lied to?? Simple...

        Our gov't has MANY spy satellites circling the earth---MORE THAN ANY OTHER COUNTRY. They can spot  ANY hot-spots here on earth from space(hot-spots is what the gov't calls  "storage areas" for radioactive materials. If Iraq ACTUALLY had any, they could have found them from the sky, NOT on the ground, where our soldiers are!

         Now, our leader has turned his eye toward Iran; Hasn't ANYONE told this "monster" that you never fight a war on TWO SEPERATE FRONTS.....let alone three???  How many more of our young people must die before someone stops this madness??  100, 1,000, 10,000, 100,000, 1,000,000???  Wake up, people!!  The entire world is laughing and pointing at us....WE have become the WARMONGER of the world.

          The people of the mid-east tell us everyday, "Americans Go Home!!!" Leave these places... let them kill everyone of themselves. These people have been around for THOUSANDS of years, and STILL haven't gotten their shit together! Let them destroy themselves! We already fought our Vietnam....get out now!!  Do any of you actually want another black wall somewhere with 58,000 names written in BLOOD, AMERICAN BLOOD???

          Am I the only one who sees this monster for just what he is??  How could this have happened? Do you REALLY THINK ANY soldier dying on foreign soil will bring back ANYONE lost inthe attacks of 2001? Why in the hell am I the only one to speak out on this? I love my country, but we are really taking a pounding in the world view. Except for Britain....the leaders there have their head so far up our leader's ass, they can't see what is going on. I can, and the view ain't none too pretty!!

            Wake up---wake up---wake up!!!

Monday, September 13, 2004

Back Again

     So, I am finally back!! I have had some downtime due to a back injury. You know the old saying, "if I had known I would live this long, I would have taken better care of myself!".  Why am I here?  DAMN GOOD QUESTION!! The only answer I can give is that I wanted to leave something for my daughters, and my grandchildren.

     I have also been EXTREMLY busy with my jewelry designs. I have come up with lots of them, and even made the proto-types for a few of them. I spent the entire weekend running after a four year old, helping with a seven month old baby, and trying to work on my designs----with the four year old on my lap, constantly asking for something to paint! Might as well get her started young!

     If I knew how to sell on the 'net, I would, but everyone on E-Bay just wants their "cut"....except the guy trying to sell, everyone makes money! I can't stand that place---it takes three days just to get through the instructional videos, on how to use the damn site----no thanks!

     Take care, children, untill you hear from me next----Adieu!!

Tuesday, September 7, 2004

Last few days---

   Last few days have been doctor is nuts!!  Not going back...I will now have to repair what that idiot screwed up!!  Damn, I love setbacks!!!

Thursday, September 2, 2004

No Subject

      OK, so the last two posts were a little rough....wah,wah, wah!!!  What do you expect? Society made the "perfect monster", and then they want to yell "foul" when the monster bites-----screw 'em all!!  I think being without any meds is a GOOD THING!!!  I can think better, and it never hurts to let the Dragon out to "play" for a little while!!!  I like the Dragon....pure, raw, power...a destructive force that cannot be tamed!! I love to turn it loose!!!

        May God, or whatever Diety you believe in protect you when I turn it loose!!!  I actually LOVE the feeling of NOT being in control!!!!!!!!!  My wife thinks I am gonna pop a vein!  Am I nuts??  Hell Yeah!!! I have papers to prove it!!  Manic Depressive, Schizophrenic(sp?), Totally Insane!!! The doctors have said it all before!!  They've had me on a million different meds!!  Like I said here before, ain't it cool to watch some poor bastard self-destruct through the "magic" of the internet???  That's right, you can cheer them on, but not get your hands dirty----let's see if we can change all of that, hmmm???


  OK, so yesterday was a bad day. Around 7:15 pm, I snapped! That's right, I TOTALLY LOST IT!!  The little rubber-band inside my head that keeps things together finally popped! I went all-out---screaming as loud as I could--red faced, high blood pressure, actually foaming at the mouth pissed off!  I even stood in my front yard, and screamed as loud as I could!! I was swearing I would KILL everyone who had ever made me mad! I let the Dragon roar, and it felt damn good!

     I am supposed to be seeing a "shrink" all of the time. Well, she quit last January---no doctor means NO MEDS!!!  I guess a certain person just pushed me over the edge yesterday, then stayed at home when I exploded. He has delighted in doing this to me for many years. He WILL NOT fight...he is a first class pussy, and a coward!  He is my age, so it's not like he is a kid. He delights in slandering my name to anyone who will listen. I have had him stand and curse me untill he turns blue!! But if I make a move toward him, he jumps in his truck and RUNS HOME!!! I want to get my hands on him....I will use a belt on him, just like a little KID!!  That's how he acts, so I will treat him that way!!

       I have seen this "so-called" 'man' curse his MOTHER, his SISTER, even HIT his dad when he was alive, and his dad was crippled!!  Yes, I have seen him do some terrible things....he will get too close to me one time too many, and he will pay for EVERYTHING he has done to anyone in his sorry time here on earth!  He is no man, he is evil, and as such, someone needs to deal with him! The police won't pick him up....the cops we have here are his friends!! The cops are just as bad as he is!

    He is scum...I have never said anything about him to anyone else here in town. That is over---if he can talk about me worse than a dog, then I think it is only fair to return the favor!!  I just wish he would fight me!!  He won't, I have tried too many times!! He even enlisted the help of one of his friends to try and kill me, then stood right in my yard, and admitted that they were going to kill me!!! It should be legal to simply shoot a stupid bastard for that alone!!  He's a pussy, a coward, a bitch, and he will continue to skulk around like the RAT that he is!  I hope the little BITCH reads this---He can't say ANYTHING, if he does, then he admits to ALL of this!!

       Hope you have a nice day, you little BITCH!!!

Wednesday, September 1, 2004

Stupid Assholes Who should know Better!!!

Well, well. Here is something I have been keeping inside me for the last two just lies there, festering, rotting, and growing blacker with each passing day!  It was caused by another person...a 'medical' person---an Idiot, to say the least.

   My youngest child has had a counselor at school for just over two years now. She absolutely LOVES her counselor. In order for her to continue seeing the counselor, she has to check in with a "regular psychiatrist" every two or three months. So, we drive the 25 miles to the offices to take her. I will do anything in my power to help my children, and so would you!

      Sometimes the doctor asks to speak with my daughter alone for a moment. I understand the need for this, as the child may tell of things that she would not normally say in front of the parents. Don't think that I 'trust' this doctor with my daughter---not even for a second. I have even told her to just yell if she needs me, I am never far from that door!  I trust NO ONE---EVER!

        Seems I was right to be that way. After her last visit, two weeks ago, on the way back home, we decided to eat out. Our little girl was strangely quiet---she is NEVER quiet. On the drive home, I asked her what was wrong. She said "nothing, dad".  I asked what the doctor said to her, she ALWAYS comes out telling what they talk about, but not this time----.  She said she would tell me when we got home.   She did,later on.

        I didn't need to push her for what the doctor said to her. She just told me by herself. Seems that the doctor asked her if I was beating her!!  I was shocked at first, then pissed off---pissed off enough to end this man's carrer, and to cause him untold amounts of pain.  The thing that pissed me off the most is that he has seen this child for over two years, and has never had any reason to suspect that I beat her!! I do not hit my child....she is just a tiny 12 year old GIRL!!!

         SHIT!! I fight with the school every year about NOT hitting her with a paddle----a piece of fucking wood!!!  Now, this DICKHEAD thinks I am beating her???  He is from the mideast, I can barely understand what he says most of the time, but I know all too well the sounds made by a human when they are having the life choked from them. He will know that sound. There are people who would simply have gone back, and shot him on sight!

   My wife has asked me to give it a little time, for me to calm down. This is not one of those things that gets better with, not ever.  When my daughter goes back, this "doctor" will get one of the biggest surprises he  has ever had. I fear no man, and him even less! I know his build, his height, and the way that he moves. Forty-five seconds is all that it will take to teach him a very important lesson. Now, for those of you who are just a little on the 'macabre' side, I will NOT take his life...I don't have the right to decide if someone dies. He will know a good measure of pain, and he will know WHY he is experiencing it.

     This was worse than insulting me---he insulted me in the eyes of my child! This will not stand! He not only questioned my integrity, he has slandered me, and did it to my child. This is made worse because of the fact that my child is a girl. Had she been a son, he would have had the birth-rite to defend his dad. As a daughter, she could not do this. I will fix that for her---I will defend my honor!  If this little BASTARD thinks this is over....well, SURPRISE!!!


Sunday, August 29, 2004

A Lesson for the Masses

     Well, I have come up with another new design for a necklace. This one is called  'The Dragon's Tooth'. Funny story; while I was cleaning the dragon's tooth, I had to scrape off some left-over bits of some poor knight that was last chewed on! Poor fool. Had he simply  asked the dragon, he would have gladly given him the tooth! At least that is how I approached the problem!

       Therein lies the lesson!!! (yes, there is a method to my madness!) People fear that which they don't understand. Because of that fear, they kill, with the hope of killing their fears! Of course, it never works! Here is a hint---learn to understand what you fear. It works, believe me! What do I fear? There are some things, but the list grows shorter everyday.

       The one thing that I will always fear---PEOPLE!! People are the worst thing I have found. They lie, cheat you, steal from you, and they just can't be trusted!  Shut-up, you know who you are!!  I have seen people pat a friend on the back, and not five minutes later, try to screw them over!  Crazy, brother, just plain crazy!

        Any of you voting in the presidential election this year?? Remember the election of 2000???  Did ANYONE not find it strange that the ONLY state that had ""TROUBLE""  with their voting results was the ONLY state that had JEB BUSH(George Bush's brother) as their governor? Hmmmm. OK, coincidence? I think not! Here's another one for you; The MI-6 agent in England who blew the whistle on Bush, and PM  Tony Blair, was found DEAD two weeks after he said that there was OVERWHELMING EVIDENCE that Iraq possessed NO WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION??  And that he shot himself while jogging in an outdoor park?? Hmmmmm.  Keep sticking your head in the sand, folks!  Maybe I will come by and KICK YOUR ASS just to wake you up!!

         Next President----George Bush! Just as sure as the sun rises in the morning! Bush's campaign people have even called into question Mr. Kerry's service record in Vietnam! Hey, George, AT LEAST HE SHOWED UP FOR THE PARTY!!  He didn't stay in the states, and "play war" for mommy and daddy!!  And have we forgotten that GEORGE BUSH THE YOUNGER was busy in the eighties ROBBING BANKS with no-good  JUNK BONDS, and was almost charged with securites fraud?  Guess when your dad is Vice President to Ronald Regan, you can get away with that shit.

         I will vote---for MICKEY MOUSE!!  Hell, he would be a better choice than what we are faced with!

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

New Day!!

      Good day to all! I put a picture of some of my necklaces that I have made on the previous page. Yes, those are mine, and they are for sale....just not on the 'net. I only sell locally...unless you are a friend, and really want one. Anyway, those are made from materials that I buy ready-made. Like the Dragon, and the Skull/dagger/wings. The bead necklaces I make by hand.

        Well, Tuesday, 08-24-04, I spent part of the day with my grand-chlidren. Always seems to make the day go by quicker when they are here!! But for the latter-half of the day, I was busy designing, and fabricating a completely NEW DESIGN!!!  I had to make this design from nothing...I made every part to this new design. Can you see a pic of it? NO, do I look "NEW" to you? It is my design, and as such, I don't want it copied right now.

          When I described it to my wife, and youngest daughter, I got a luke-warm reaction. That's normal...I have come up with ideas that didn't work out before, so I never give their reaction another thought. What I DID do was to forge ahead, make the darn thing, then give it to them to see what happens.

        UTTER SHOCK!!! That's right, SHOCK! Neither one of them could believe what I had created!! They were actually speechless!! (For my 12 year old girl, that is no easy thing!!) I had enough materials on-hand to 'create' three of these new proto-types. One each for my wife, and two daughters. This a COMPLETELY NEW DESIGN! I have never seen anything like it!

         Don't get your hopes up, though, it is primarily designed for younger people, and will only cost about $6.00(U.S.). It isn't terribly expensive to make, and can be sold realatively cheaply. I would think that no one over 30 would have any interest in it. I do forsee everyone in my daughter's school wearing it! Plus the fact that everyone in my town knows about my jewelry-making! Another 'plus' for this design is that it makes noise...if you want it to!!  I see it as a form of 'communication' for kids in class, who don't want to get caught talking! One small sound from the necklace, and your friend will know that you are 'communicating' with them from across the room. The teacher will never know where it came from!!

          This design is for male, and female, and can come in ANY color you can think of!! Believe me, I have ALL colors that most people could think of! Can it come in mixed colors? Why not!! Well, I need to get out of here, and to the local 'supplier'. Take care!!

Friday, August 20, 2004

The Final Play??

      Odd, but I recieved a box or two of my mother's things this past Sunday. She has always been heavily into Indian Beadwork( AMERICAN INDIAN). She taught me at a very young age to do this sort of thing, I guess it comes as no surprise that I enjoy doing it now.

        Anyway, I found a necklace that she started, and never finished....sort of like her life....cut off too soon. I will finish this necklace for my wife, later she will give it to one of our children, and things go on.

        The strangest part of this whole ordeal? My mom used to call late at night, sometimes just to babble on about nothing, and sometimes to scream and curse at me. I always sat patiently, and listened. I never argued, or hung up on her, although she did it to me several times! LOL  I used to regret hearing the phone ring late at night---I knew who it was before I picked it up.

        Just before she died, she called to tell me just how much she hated me, and the other kids....well, I sat for 45 minutes listening to that tirade. When she quit, I asked if she was finished, she said she was, and hung up. That was about three months before she was taken from me. Two nights before I recieved the call from the hospital saying that she was in a coma, she called again. She asked if I had just called, it wasn't me I said. But, for some reason, her tone was different this night.

         She spoke of many things that night. I have always been angry with my mother for the things that she did throughout her life---that was MY problem, not her's. She always denied having done anything wrong. That's ok, I came to forgive her, and accept her as she was that or nothing. Four days after that call late one night, I was the one to have the job of telling the docs to turn off the machinery that was keeping her alive.

        I thought we had a little more time...maybe just enough to help me to understand her a little better. She was a hard woman, she could fight, shoot, cuss, drink, she taught me to throw knives, the list goes on. Did you know that "Puff the Magic Dragon" was my favorite song since I was about five years old? She did...and she just finished a beautiful ceramic Sea-Dragon with golden wings for me before she died.It sits in my living-room. It is the last piece of ceramics that she ever made, and I have it.

          You are guaranteed NOTHING in this life....go now, and keep this in mind, don't find out the hard way like I did.