Wednesday, December 17, 2008

The Lesson

Today's post is more of a lesson. Something that happened to me in my mis-spent youth. The year was 1976. I was sixteen, and looking for a summer job. Nothing really jumped out at me, and my grandmother was helping to find me a job. She read in the paper that garbage men were needed.

Upon hearing this news, I scoffed. "Garbage man"? That was too far beneath me! I kept on looking. As I lived in a semi-rural area, jobs were hard to come by. Eventually I swalloed my pride, and interviewed for the garbage man position. To my dismay, I was hired on the spot!!!

As I got to know the guys on the trucks, and spent time on the job with them, I realized something; they were no different than myself! They were pepole just like me, they just worked a thankless job. These guys worked hard, and long hours for very little pay.

Well, as things go, I told my grandmother about my new feelings for the garbage men. She told me I had learned a lesson in humility. She told me to always remember that I am above no one! I may be someone's equal, but I am never better than another human being...we are all in the same boat here on Earth.

My grandmother has since passed on, but the lesson has stayed with me. I think all of us should work at least one summer on a garbage truck.........

Friday, December 12, 2008

I missed two very important dates...November 16, and December 3rd. Those are the dates of when I and a friend of mine quit smoking five years ago. I have no idea how I overlooked those dates. Those are critical dates to me. One of the biggest accomplishments of my life was on December 3, 2003. My friend, as you can clearly see, had a couple of weeks on me. I loved her, and now she is gone. I said my goodbyes, but it still leaves me with a weird feeling, knowing that I can never ask her for advice again.

And if you are thinking about me meeting up with her later on the "other side", think again. There are special places for such a kind-hearted soul as hers, and one as black as mine. I hate it when people say that someone who has died is "in a better place". I hate it, but I hope for her that it is true. I am no longer babysitting the grandkids. My son-in-law lost his job just before Thanksgiving. He never misses work, but was sick, and went to the doctor on a Friday afternoon, and his boss fired him. This is Mississippi, we have no labor laws here! He worked for these people for 11 years!

And in even worse news, I have heard just about every kind of threat on Mr. Barack Obama, our new president-elect. Let me explain something right now...some stupid fucking redneck will try to take him out. Of this I am sure. I am also sure of one other thing...that single action will spread more fear and chaos in the United States than any terorrist could ever hope for. If you are reading this and having stupid thoughts....just don't, ok? You have no idea what will follow...I do know, and it won't be pretty. We don't need to be fighting amongst ourselves, we need to fight the rich scumbags that run Washington...not the new pres.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

The Extent of Our Sorrow

As tears disappearing in the rain, so short is our time on this Earth. Why then do some of us want to make it shorter still? Why, in that short amount of time, is there so much sorrow for some? Could it be that without the pain we could not know the joy of being truly alive? These are merely the musings of a worn out, heart-broken old man. Will I ever know the answers to these questions? Are any of us meant to know? Untill next time...

Friday, November 7, 2008

Well, well, here we are! America has a new president. Will he work for the "common man", or will he line the pockets of the rich man? We will see come January. Untill then, Mr. Obama, untill then!

In other news, I am still babysitting for the grandkids. I had them every day last week, including Sunday, as their mom and dad had to work! It seems like they teach me something new every day. The little grandson(age 4 yrs.) is now so adept at handling my computer that I am not afraid to let him go it alone! He cannot read yet, but he manages just fine. Just the other day he told me some words that were on-screen. Pretty good for a little guy like him.

I have tried to teach him a few words. I think he "reads" them purely by memory. Oh well, any landing you can walk away cool boys and girls!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Ass-Kissing 101

I would first like to say "hi" to a new follower, Liz in Virginia. Hi, Liz! Now, you must remember, I am an old Biker, so it can get rough in here sometimes. Having said that, welcome aboard.

I am currently TRYING to read a book entitled "Plan of Attack", by Bob Woodward. If that name sounds familiar, he also wrote some other books, most notably "All the President's Men", back in the 1970's. It was all about the Nixon involvement in the Watergate breakins. I say I am trying to read this book because it is so hard to see a once-great author sink to this level!

Mr. Woodward has his nose so far up George Bush's ass, he should check on the health of the man's colon! Nowhere in the book does Mr. Bush do any wrong! I just don't understand HOW the media can never fault this man!(Bush) How many more of our young soldiers must die for Mr. Bush to be vindicated for starting this endless war? How many more American lives are worth the oil we get? I say not one! I would rather WALK than waste another young American life in Iraq!

Five years into this war, and there is no end in sight. This was bound to happen! Did Vietnam teach us nothing? Did the war in Afghanistan that Russia waged for just over ten years teach us nothing? Every day I watch the news, and they up-date the number of Americans lost in the war. Every day I curse George Bush a little more. It does no good, but I do it anyway.

And today we elect a new president.....or do we? We all recall how Mr. Bush got in office. With lying and cheating. Am I the only one to find something strange in the fact that the only state in the Union to have "ballot problems" in the 2000 election was Florida? The state where Mr. Bush's BROTHER was,and still is, the governor? Hmmm, kind of makes you wonder?

Monday, November 3, 2008

Still Crap

I still hate this new site. The actual problem is that I hate change, most men do. If it weren't for the fact that I hate change, I would have already walked out on my wife! She deserves no special treatment, as what she did was unforgivable. I will never forve her, nor will I forget.

On a lighter note...oh, wait, there is no lighter note, as she destroyed my life! I am now stuck with a woman that I will never trust again! "Damaged Goods" is all that she good to me.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

This Is Bulls##t

I don't like this new site! Strange how the price of AOL just went up recently, and they are actually cutting features! What a way to drive away customers! They must be leaving in droves. I would be one of the rats jumping ship, except my wife and daughter like AOL's features....the ones that are left, anyway.

So, this past Saturday the youngest girl threw a Halloween Party. Word at school is that the kids had a good time! The ol' lady got a bit loopy, but all was well. my daughter is friends with one boy that I am afraid will never make it to adulthood. He is always depressed, and just recently quit school because of the other kids fucking with him. It is a shame, really, that in this day and time, we still have bullies in schools.

Did Columbine and other school shootings not teach anyone anything? The days of the bully are dead as those at Columbine. If you think that shooting spree was anything other than retribution, then you are way behind the curve, my friend. Wake up, pal!

In other news, I am still babysitting the grandkids, and thourghly lovin' it! The little boy is a blast. And the stories he can tell! Sometimes he just spends about an hour bending my ear with some incredible story about how he is a Power Ranger, and taking care of bad guys! I think he has found my muse, and she is woking for him! Now, if I can just get the drunk little minx to come back to me!

Be good guys and girls!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Welcome One and All

Well, here we are in the new place! If you are already one of my "minions", then you know just what to expect to see here. If you are new to my journal, hang on, cause this can get to be a fairly wild ride at times. Be cool guys and girls!

Monday, September 15, 2008

It's Been A While

So, here I finally am, back again. I need to get here far more often than once every month! I am just about worn out caring for my grandkids everyday! And, my health has taken a turn for the worse.


      For about three weeks now, I have been battling a bad case of shingles. It decided to open up on my right side, just where my belt-line is. Even if you have no idea what shingles is, don't worry. It cannot be spread, and is caused by the same virus that causes chicken pox. And that, in turn, is a form of Herpes. According to the doc, it lays dormant along both sides of your spine, and can jump up and bite you at any time. It seems that if your nervous system is already stressed, it can come up easily.


        I think we all know just "who" stresses me the most right now, hmmm? Oh, and the best part? My blood-sugar readings have been off the charts with this extra shit bothering me. But, evidently, someone "up there" is not finished fucking with me just yet! "Ah, sleep, those little slices of Death, how I abhore them". Edgar Allen Poe...what can I say, the man was gifted.


         What does that line mean to me? Quit teasing me, and let's get on with the business of Death! Never has one person given up so much to be treated so badly as I.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

In Praise of Carburetors

Hello, again. How are you doing? Ok, shut up, it was a rhetorical question! I have noticed of late, a disturbing trend. It seems that more and more people want to pull out in front of us in traffic, or cut us off too short. After having made this observation, I came up with a theory as to just why these things are happening more frequently...carburetors...or the lack thereof. Let me explain.


       You see, back in the good old days of gas guzzling v-8 engines, nearly every vehicle came with a  carburetor. If you are unfamilliar with this device, let me explain it very simply for you; a carburetor sat atop an engine and mixed fuel and air in just the right amounts to make your vehicle go. Nowadays it is done with far more precision using computers and fuel injectors. With the new way to meter fuel and air comes a distinct hesitation.


         Can you remember back when sometimes you stepped on the gas in the good old days, and your car would "stumble", or hesitate? You were far less likely to pull out in front of that 18 wheeler, knowing you might very well be killed! This is where my theory comes into play...bear with me here.


              With todays cars having no carbs, there is no hesitation, therefore no fear of dying. If some of these idiots had made these same mistakes a few years ago, when cars had carburetors, they surely would have died! But, by the use of computers and fuel injectors, these idiots are allowed to live, no matter how poorly they might drive.


             So then, that is my theory. I look at the carburetor as mankind's Lion of the Sarengetti...something to "thin the herd" as it were. We have eliminated this "Lion", thereby insuring our survival, and that of the clueless driver, also!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Hello, Again

Well, it has been awhile since I was here. I know it has been a long time, quit yer bitchin'! I'll get around to everything, ok? First of all I told you that I found my long lost Uncle that meant so much to me. Well, seems he owns a shop where he makes custom longbows for the general public! I am now the proud owner of one of those bows.


       The workmanship on this bow is out-fuckin'-standing!!! You simply CANNOT get this type of quality in mass-produced items! Oh, by the way, I own no less than three compound bows to go with my custom longbow. Yes, I am part Indian, and I enjoy archery! Who would have thought it? LOL


         Now, on to other things. I recently started baby-sitting for the grandkids everyday! That is soon to be a moot point, as school starts here tomorrow. I don't know if my daughter will send the little boy to pre-school(he is only four years old). I do know that his sister must go, as she will be in the third grade this time around.


        Ok, what about me? What have I been doing with myself? Not much, really. The depression still weighs heavy on my heart and mind...and my soul if I have one. I did manage to send my Uncle, and his brother, a knife that I made for him, and a necklace for his brother! I take each day as it comes, and wonder about the next before it gets here. I am drowning in a sea of apathy, and I don't care.(Some of you will not get that!).

Monday, June 23, 2008

"Sorry, we just don't have Time".

My wife and I took our youngest daughter and one of her girl friends to the Mall in Tupelo Sunday. You need to understand that we have to drive nearly for an hour to get there. And with today's rising gas prices, it is no small financial feat to do so. So, we had been there for a bit, walking around, when I needed to rest for a while. I sat down in front of some toys that children ride on. You know, trucks, "race cars", wagons, whatever. You put the quarters in and the child gets bounced around for a minute or two. Little did I know that I would experience a life event that would prompt my writing here.


       A little girl, no more than five years old walked among the toys, and asked her dad could she ride one. "No", her dad had said, "we just don't have the time". As  I heard those words, I thought of my oldest daughter, and to her two children. How many times did my wife or I tell that oldest girl, "no, we just don't have the time". We can never recover those times lost.We had the time, we just never understood how precious, and fleeting, our time with our children is. We should have made time. The man in the Mall should have made time. If he had to be somewhere important, then why was he in the mall in the first place?


        I want to say so many things about spending time with your children while they are small. But you KNOW all of the things I want to say! All of us do! We now try to make the time for our youngest girl. I spent two nights in a row sitting in a skating rink with my youngest...because she wanted me to. Our children crave our approval, and our love. I miss the times I spent with my oldest girl. The times I wanted to fish, and she wanted to swim and splash in the water, and scare away any fish within a two mile area! The kites she wanted to fly...the animals she would wag home, and try to save. All of that is gone now, just so many memories stored in my head.

         Make time for your children, not excuses. You can never go back...if you have grown children, then you know what I mean!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

We All Have to Pay...

Have you seen this shit? We are now forced to buy "converter boxes" to see our tv after January '09? The fuckin' cable companies were going to make everyone pay for cable one way or the other! Either you have cable, or, if you get tv on an antenna, then you now have to buy the converter boxes that are for sale by the cable companies. Fuck that!


       This is simply another example of Congress passing laws without our knowledge! You didn't think that all of the cable companies just decided to go digital all at once? Oh no, my friends, this was brought on by the cable companies, but Congress passed the legislation to make it happen! And the cost of these boxes? They start at $40;00! I am sure that there are more expensive ones. This is bullshit, and we should not stand for it! I am writing to Senator Trent Lott, of Mississippi. I will tell him just what a rip-off this really is! There are lots of rural living people who count on big antennas to get their tv. Fuck these corporate assholes!


         On a lighter note. Our car has been making a funny noise so my wife took it to a "trained" Nissan mechanic.  All she got from him was that one of the belts was loose, so he tightened it. Still the noise persisted. I told her it sounded like an external noise, like the water pump, or the power steering pump. Meanwhile, back at the shop, and the heavily trained mechanic, he just scratches his head and says he can't figure it out? So, last Thursday, guess what happens? You guessed it... the water pump went out about three miles from the dealer, and their trained mechanic! Now, how did I know it was the water pump? Lifetime experience, that's how! I trained as a diesel mechanic in the Army, but it is all almost the same thing! I have never worked on foriegn cars before, but I am sure they are not so different from U.S. cars. Except for Mazdas. They have "rotary" engines in them!


           My oldest daughter took me to eat a steak dinner last Saturday for Father's Day. I just had fun with the kids, I didn't really need the dinner at all!!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Here Again?

Who are we? Don't give me your name! WHO are you...WHY are you here? I have asked myself these questions lately more and more. I find no answer. Want to know if your life is important? Ask yourself this..."In one hundred years, will anyone remember me?" If the answer is "no", then you are un-important. Join the club!

Monday, June 9, 2008

A Submission

A submission from dkbsnurse, enjoy it, peons!!!


1  There will be no special bilingual programs in the schools.
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  *
2.  All ballots will be in this nation's language.
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3.. All government business will be conducted in our  language.
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4. Non-residents will NOT have the right to vote no matter how long they are here.
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5. Non-citizens will NEVER be ab le to hold political office.
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6  Foreigners will not be a burden to the taxpayers.   No welfare, no food  stamps, no health care,  or other government assistance programs. Any burden will be deported.
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  * * * * * * * *
7.  Foreigners can invest in this country, but it must be an amount at least equal to 40,000 times the daily minimum wage.
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  *
8. If foreigners come here and buy land... Options will be restricted. Certain parcels including  waterfront property are reserved for citizens naturally born into this country.
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  *
9.. Foreigners may have no protests; no demonstrations, no waving of a foreign flag, no political organizing, no  bad-mouthing our president or his policies. &n bsp; These will lead to deportation.
     * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  *
10.  If you do come to this country illegally,  you will be actively hunted &, when caught, sent to jail until your deportation can be arranged.  All assets will be taken from you.
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Harsh, you say?.......

The above laws are current immigration laws of


An Answer to a Question

Dang it! Someone asked the question about my drinking; most notably that I didn't do it anymore. Well, I DO drink the occasional beer, and a little whiskey or tequila thrown in for good measure! Believe me, I do not drink like I used to! Shit, I used to drink like it was a sport or hobby!


      That is almost correct...if you could smoke it, snort it, inject it, or drink it, I was there! By the tender age of 19 I was an addict. I had to do something and quick. I kicked everything for a long time. I now drink a little bit, but it takes so much to get me drunk these days! I can get a big bottle of whiskey, and drink the entire thing in an evening! But I don't...I make it last for about three days. Hey! That is a stretch for me!!


        Something you should know; my girls have NEVER seen me drunk. I never hit their mom, or run around with other women. Hell, I even gave up smoking! I need some form of vice guys! Hell, even my muse drinks to excess! I try to keep her sober, but then she never has any ideas about what to write!


         Take note; my Bowflex is working wonders! I am not losing much weight, but my damn arms are getting huge!!! Back when I was a wrestler,  my arms measured 19 inches at the biceps! I am going for more than that this time around!!!! Don't worry, I can STILL break boards with one punch! That is what I like!!!


       Be nice, and take care of each other. You never know when the person you piss off will get even....or how!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Another Great Day

Well, this has been one tough month so far. At least this past Tuesday I had both grandchildren all day! I tell you, those two can wear the horns off of a brass billy-goat! The shit at home is still the same, I hate my wife, and she hates me! At least I have some beer for now. it seems like the only time my muse is around is when I drink. There is Vodka in the fridge, but I hate the taste of that stuff. To me it tastes like lighter fluid!


       I will just stick with beer and whiskey! My best friend is named "Jack"....Jack Daniels, that is!!! See that? That was my muse! Don't worry, I am not drunk, I am just on my first....oops, second, beer at this point. I need a whole case to be drunk! An entire case gets me a good buzz for about an hour before it starts going away.


        NEWS FLASH!!! I found the Uncle that I write so much about! After at least 30 years, I found him. He is out West, and makes traditional long bows! He is currently making me a custom bow as we speak. His brother, my other uncle, is with him!!! I am making both of them a custom knife to keep! Yes, I still make jewelry, but if you were reading last year, you might recall that I started making deer-horn handle knives. I only make these knives to order, and each one is different from the others. This is neccesary due to the difference in the horns!


      Be good, and be good to each other. Keep love in your heart, and never harm others. Love you guys...Holla' If You Hear Me!!!

Monday, May 12, 2008

My "Littte Sister"

As any of you who come here knows by now, I lost a very dear friend a couple of weeks ago. She has embarked on the "Great Spirit Journey". This is a journey that all of us will make. Do not worry for her, she will be ok. I promise this to you, and to her.


     Mother Earth, or Gaia, will embrace her for all eternity. She now walks with my spirit brothers, the wolf and the bear. They will accompany and protect her from now on. My spirit animal, the great red hawk, will guide and advise her on her journey. I have sent my spirit brothers and the great hawk to help my friend because she helped me on many occaisions. She never asked for anything in return, but I owe her this. I owe her this as a human, as a friend, and as a brother.


       We give her to you, Mother Earth. Please hold and comfort her in her time of need. Please point her in the right direction as she begins this long journey. Please love and comfort her. We ask this of you, Mother Earth.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Short Story Contest

There is a contest to write a  short story or poem using certain words and phrases. The lady that is sponsoring this contest will give away a bunch of cosmetics to the winner. Now, I don't need cosmetics, but I promised them to my daughter if I win. So, you tell me what you think...


                      Death Of A Princess

Long, long ago, there lived two souls. A man and a woman. Between them there was such a love as no other. A love that was timeless, ageless, and more Caring than any other. They were husband and wife, Prince and Princess. They enjoyed their time together, but there came a time when the husband had to go off to fight in some stupid war. War raged all around his kingdom. He had to protect his home, and those that he loved.
       The wife longed for her Soul-Mate to come back to the safety of their castle, back to her loving arms. She Day-Dreamed constantly of the time she shared with her Prince. She was Haunted with the memory of him, the smell of him, the feel of him. She could not know that the battle was going well for her Prince. He decided he would send no word in advance, and surprise her with a home-coming!
       The enemy, seeing that the Prince may well win this war sent word to the princess by messenger that her beloved Prince had fallen in battle. Mortally wounded, his heart pierced by the enemy's arrow! The Princess was devastated. Her Tears fell like Crystal upon the floor of the castle. She would see her Soul-Mate no more. Nevermore to touch him, to hold him, to know him. She knew he would be laid into the cold ground. Never to be seen again by anyone in the Kingdom.
        In no time, she made up her mind that she would be with her Prince again. Not even Death himself could hold her back! A dagger on the bedroom dresser, and a quick plan of action. She quickly plunged the dagger into her own breast! In merely a second the deed was done. The Princess breathed her last in just a few seconds. She would join her Prince in Death. They both now belong to the ages.
_____The six words I chose for this short story were...Caring, Haunted, Day Dream, Soul Mate, Crystal, and Tears. I hope that you enjoy it!


Monday, May 5, 2008

All Days are Tough

So much depression, and only just so many days. Am I incapable of being happy now? It seems so at this point. I did manage to find a writing contest that I am thinking of entering. I have people tell me that they love my writing, but I fear they are just being nice. I am certainly no "Rhodes Scholar"! LOL

    Not much going on here. My wife is still dodging me. If she doesn't want me, why not just tell me? Stop wasting my time, and hers. I am sick of this shit. Merely living with someone who doesn't want or need you. Just existing from day to day. I positively hate this shit! I wish she would make up her mind. One thing; this would make a great short story...

Monday, April 28, 2008

The More things Change...

Well, things have quieted down some around here. I have some new medicine for my dizziness...let's all hope it works! Or not, whatever. I got Alex (son-in-law) a box of premium cigars for his birthday. I always get him a knife, so I thought I would add a little "extra" this time. I'm not too inspired to write just now. It would seem that my muse has fled again. Like the rats leaving a sinking ship. That analogy fits in more than one way...

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

The Loss of a Friend

"And there came a pale horse, and upon it sat a pale rider. And his name was Death". I lost a beautiful friend today. Last night, actually. I'm sorry, but for this one, I just don't have the words...I miss you, Jean, my "little sister."

Monday, April 21, 2008

New Place to Visit!!!




LONDON, ON – In only one year, has evolved from a Web-based dating connection into a life-asserting online community. With chat rooms, personal profiles, and photo albums, it is best described as a cross between My Space, Face Book, and a dating site…but with a twist. It is niched for those who are physically or medically disabled – and there is nothing else like it online.

Louise Maxwell, the site’s founder and administrator, has been instrumental in drastically changing the lives of its members. With close to 2400 members before its current restructure, including lawyers, pastors, psychologists, and other professionals, the site has become a support system for the disabled by the disabled – and a support for parents of disabled children. is quickly building a reputation for providing a new outlook or purpose in life as members become extended family – and many have developed friendships and romance that otherwise would not have been possible. "Louise made me feel worthy and confident…not trapped and sad," said one member. "I have never felt so good about myself in my entire life."

Online membership ranges from age 21 to 87 with most between 40 and 55. Maxwell takes the time to discover each person’s strengths and brings it out through chat room conversations to help build self-esteem. And she is extremely protective of her online community. Spammers and scammers are quickly identified and eliminated to protect the vulnerable members.

Maxwell worked more than twenty years in medical offices surrounded by the very ill and disabled – and she was in her comfort zone. After becoming disabled herself in her late thirties due to numerous back surgeries following a car accident, she discovered that she continually had to prove she was smart and capable. Being housebound for nearly ten years, she felt isolated…and understands the needs of the disabled community first hand. "Just because you’re physically handicapped doesn’t mean that your heart and soul are. We’re empowering people to be who they want to be," said Maxwell.

At the type of disability doesn’t matter – the important thing is that everyone is regarded as an individual with unique talents and aspirations. Maxwell recognizes this in each member and strives to make everyone feel good about themselves.

"Members form a unique community in which they feel safe, accepted, and appreciated regardless of their country of origin," said Maxwell, "because in the hearts of the disabled, no border exists."

CONTACT: Louise Maxwell, 



Jesus Wept

...So what's new, right? It seems like I always have something to say! I just wanted to make a comment for those that suffer from depression. There is a passage in the Bible that simply states "Jesus Wept". If He suffered from depression, indeed he did weep.

       If "Jesus wept", then it seems he got over it. Depression is different. I think I can speak for most when I say that depression is like the worst thing that ever broke your heart....and it happens to you EVERY SINGLE DAY. There is no reprieve, no holiday from it. You can wake up with every intention of having a good day, but the crushing depression takes care of that very quickly.

       People tell you to just "get over it". Don't we wish! How would you like to have your heart ripped out every day, no matter what you WANTED to feel like? That is depression, and it hardly ever gets any better. Jesus wept sounds like a small problem to me. And, please, I am not comparing myself to Jesus, or anyone spiritual, I am just making a point.        actually, if one were to look at all things considered, I think maybe Jesus was a bit depressed, maybe?

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

All Fool's Day

Shit! I missed April Fool's Day! Oh, well, I guess there are enough fools out there to keep everyone busy! If you feel the urge to laugh at a fool, just tune in Mr. Bush at anytime his mouth is moving! I find it totally hilarious just how much information has been suppressed about global warming during his dictatorship in the interest of preserving the oil business!

         Oh, wait, he is in the oil business! Now it all makes sense! I hope at some point you realize that I am being far as I am concerned, sarcasm is a dying art-form these days. Everyone wants satire. That shit is just too dry and un-funny! Satire is best left to the political cartoonists, and maybe Jerry Sienfeld. Sarcasam is where the money is! Follow my lead here...

   ....."You might be a redneck"...if you are STILL listening to that 25 year old shit! "Git-R-Done"...Have you ever seen a cable-guy DO ANYTHING?!..."Here's Your Sign"...Yeah, if the sign says 'outdated, over the hill bullshit'. After these so-called "Blue Collar Comedians" we have Mr. Ron White, my hero! A drunk who isn't afraid to go public! Out of these four so-called funny-men, I find only Ron White to be the funny one! Come, Mr. White, it is time that you hooked up with the premier funny guy on the planet, ME! Drop those outdated assholes you run with, and I will show you how to hone your craft to a fine edge! And believe it or not, I would tell these guys they are outdated and not very funny...just say the word! Questions, comments, rude remarks? You know where to find me!


;-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! ;-)



Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Saving the Planet(Riiiiight!)

Well, since we are saving all of that money on our insurance, how about we buy a "green" car? Hmmm? What was that, you already drive an electric? Shame on you, and on all of those stupid-assed movie stars that tell you what to drive!


     Take your basic, average electric car, and what does it need? Well, electricity, for one thing! Well, let's just see how "green" our little car is. Wait, it has no gas engine, so it emits ZERO hydrocarbons! Really? When you plug it in, where does the electricity come from? Magic? No. It comes from the power company, the same power company that burns COAL to make that electricity! That's right, COAL. The epitome of hydro carbons! Carbon itself! Clean? I think not!


       A better alternative? Ethanol. In 2006, we took the equivalent of the emmissions of 1.2 million cars out of the atmosphere just by burning Ethanol. And that was only SOME OF US! Don't be mislead by what others tell you. Movie stars always want to lend their names to things, and they don't have a clue what they are talking about! Most of them should just show a picture of their ass when they are speaking, that is where most of what they are saying comes from, anyway.


      Questions, comments, snide remarks? You know where to find me!

Monday, March 24, 2008

Saving Money with Geico

So, if I switch my car insurance to Geico, I can save about $350:00 per year, AND, it is so easy, a caveman could do it! So, after that, if I switch to Allstate, they promise another savings of at least $350:00 also! The way I figure it, if I switch twice, they will actually PAY ME to have insurance! You just can't beat that deal!

     Now, the way that I see things, this is a good deal for me, and for the rest of you, as well! If I continue to wait for two more years, when I turn 50, I can sign up with the AARP Insurance, and save up to $500:00 per year! Why worry about being "taken care of" in your later years? According to these idiots, we can all have auto coverage, AND get paid as well!!!! Sign me up!

      On the homefront, I am still sick with whatever it was that I had! Anytime I stand up, I am dizzy as hell. I still have a little cough, although not as bad as before. Thank Goodness I quit smoking! I think this sickness, plus smoking, would have killed me this time around! My doctor is quitting her practice. She has been seeing me since 1993! I HATE CHANGING DOCTORS! You spend all those  years getting used to one person, and they quit on you! Well, she IS 71 years old, and she needs a rest. I know that she routinely puts in 16 hour days, and maybe more at times.

           That should catch you up for a bit, now. Stay out of trouble, and you know just where to find me if you want to!


;-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! ;-)

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Sick Days

Hey, there. I am finally getting back to normal, thanks to contracting the flu this past weekend. Nasty little bug, that one! Kept me down very well indeed! Well, my youngest daughter showed me just WHY she is my daughter the other day when she said to me, "hey, pop, guess what?" I said, "ok, I'll bite, what"?  "People are like 'Slinkys'; dull, boring, seemingly devoid of fun, but, they both still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs!" I love that kid! Here are a few more for your amusement....


Spreading the Stupidity...

Only in drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering


Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Monday, February 25, 2008

"Bad" Americans

Thanks To Ms. Jean For This One!!!


I Am the Liberal-Progressives Worst Nightmare. I am an American.
I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some Liberal governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!
I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way!
I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.
I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, do it in English.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.
My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.
I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time watching or arguing about it.
I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut up already.
I believe if you don't like the way things are here, go back to where you came from and change your own country! This is AMERICA.
If you were born here and don't like it you are free to move to any Socialist country that will have you.
I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?
  I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry rear if you're running from them..
I also think they have the right to pull you over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.
And, no, I don't mind having my face shown on my drivers license. I think it's good..... And I'm proud that "God" is written on my money.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.
I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me stuff or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause.
I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.
I believe "illegal" is illegal no matter what the lawyers think.
I believe the American flag should be the only one allowed in AMERICA!
If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.
If you are a BAD American too, please forward this to everyone you know.

We want our country back!

Just Killin' Time

...That's right, you saw it. I am actually listening to music again. I am trying to desperately lift the veil of depression. Imagine if you will that a fully loaded dump truck has been parked on top of you, and you must lift it off. You can see my dilemma.

       I am trying so hard to come out of this. Everyone knows that my wife did this to me, and that it was already there, she just made it so much worse. Enough about her, she doesn't deserve the "air time" that she gets! I could say plenty, but it just isn't worth it. Is she forgiven? I don't know just yet, mostly not.

        It also seems that my far-ranging, drunk little muse has come back to me. Everything in my life is female...wife, muse, daughters, granddaughter, mother-in-law, and the memory of my murdered mother. I seem to be drowning in Estrogen!!! At least I have a grandson waiting in the wings! Not to sound conceited, but I know that the little guy just loves coming to see Pop-Pop! And I love him, too!

        I have gone back to a favorite saying of mine lately..."Never intefere in the Affairs of Dragons, for you are Crunchy, and Taste Good with Ketchup!


Saturday, February 23, 2008

Music (Or the Lack Thereof)

Music...what has it become? Where are the days of music actually speaking to us? What happened to bands like the Beatles? Jim Croce, Lynyrd Skynyrd, America, Boston, for goodness' sake? What does today's music say to us? We are skinny little post-modern assholes living on trust funds?


     Screw that mess! What can some little 17 year old tell me about life? I am 47 years ex-biker, a total rocker, and completely hardcore in any way that you can think of! Keep your little whiny ass at home with your mama! Give me a hard-drivin' beat, along with a few shots of whiskey, and make me believe that a woman broke your heart. Not that you are reading off of a sheet of lyrics!


        Give me Aerosmith saying that "the rabbit done died", and make me think about what that means! Give me some "Sweet Emotions" to wear out on my sleeve! Give me Ted Nugent saying that he has "Cat-Scratch Fever", and all that that entails! Tell me that you need "Three Steps Mister", and just why you need them! Tell me about the "Four Walls of Raiford Prison", and how you have spent a lifetime there!


       Tell me that you rode a "Horse With No Name" across the desert, and why you did so! Make me believe that you have seen the inside of a lot of bar-rooms, and that you have spit out at least ONE TOOTH there! Make me believe that you have been alive! And sit down and shut the hell up if you are only 17 or 18 years old!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Robbing Wal-Mart Blind

So, there we were in Wal-Mart a couple of weeks ago, Me, my wife, and the youngest girl. I was in the computer-games section, daydreaming, when my youngest comes over and says that a lady will sell her some phone cards at a discount.  I tell her to ask her mom if it is ok. I had no idea that this "lady" did not work at Wal-Mart!


  You see, the cards that they purchased were shop-lifted just seconds before, and were therefore no good, as they had not been activated by a Wal-Mart employee! My wife chases the "lady" down, and threatens her with multiple personal injuries, and is able to recover her money! I, in the meantime, tell one of the boys in electronics(where the cards were lifted) to get security on the hook, and get this broad before she leaves the store. They at least had her for shop-lifting!


    "No can do, dude! We used to have a security guy, but he quit sometime ago!" WHAT???? This is a Wal-Mart SuperCenter!!! There are literally cameras everywhere you look?!?!?! My mind was reeling! My first thought was..."just HOW MANY GUYS can I get in here robbing this place blind!" But my next thought was "EX_BIKER, dude, EX! Man, twenty years ago, that place would have been stripped! And I wouldn't have felt bad about doing it! Especially after hearing that there is NO SECURITY?!?!?! Man, me and a few of my ex-buds would have cleared that place out!


       So, if you are in Wal-Mart, be careful. I was told that they would not cover the price you paid for the would just be written off as your loss, even if it took place in the store! Knowing what I know now, I would recover my losses on my own!!!



Wednesday, February 13, 2008

The Touch That Could Change the World

There is in each of us, no matter how humble, a capacity for love. Even if our lives have not taken the course we had envisioned, even if we are less than the shape of our dreams, we are part of the human family. Somewhere, in the most inconsequential corners of our lives, is the opportunity for love.

If I am blind, I can run my hand across the back of a shell and celebrate beauty. If I have no legs, I can sit in quiet wonder before the restless murmurs of the sea. If I am wounded in spirit, I can reach out my hand to those who are hurting. If I am lonely, I can go among those who are desperate for love. There is no tragedy or injustice so great, no life so small and inconsequential, that we cannot bear witness to the light in the quiet acts and hidden moments of our days.

And who can say which of these acts and moments will make a difference?

The universe is a vast and magical membrane of meaning, stretching across time and space, and it is not given to us to know her secrets and her ways. Perhaps we were placed here to meet the challenge of a single moment; perhaps the touch we give will cause the touch that will change the world.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

What Women Want

What Women Want...wasn't that a movie with Mel Gibson? Anyway, here are a few things I have come to realize, and the reasoning(or lack thereof) behind them. Women want someone who will treat them like shit! I will now explain.


      My first wife was always sleeping around on me, and I would do the same when I would catch her. We finally got divorced, which was a good thing. Before she walked out of my life(taking two beautiful girls that I was prevented from ever seeing) forever, she told me I was too nice. I wasn't rough with her, and not aggressive  enough. Real classy, that dame was!


      Now, having lived through the infidelities of the second wife, and her lying to my face about it, she actually had the nerve to say that when I touched her, I acted as though she were made of glass, and would break! Again, it seems that I am not "rough enough".


       So, from now on, I will no longer ask if she is in the mood. Who gives a shit? I will simply take what I want! So what if she gets slapped around a little? At least then I can't be called "too gentle"?  Women don't seem to want someone to treat them right. I do my best to be gentle and kind, and I am labeled as "soft".


     Well fuck that! From now on, women are on the bottom of my list...something to be crushed underfoot! I have seen guys treat women like shit, and the woman keeps coming back for more?!?! From now on, I will no longer cow-tow to any woman. If I go into a store and a woman follows, I will no longer hold the door for her. Fuck her, she can get the door as easily as I. From now on, I will be on top of the heap! No more taking shit from bitches!

Monday, February 4, 2008

Emos, Goths, and Kids These Days

Well, as some of you can tell, my muse has somewhat returned to me. She still drinks too much, and just goofs off, but she at least shows up once-in-awhile. So, Emos, Goths, and kids these days. My youngest girl is "Goth" at times, and she is "Emo" at times. We all know what Goth is, but the "Emo" will take a little bit more explaining. Here goes...


       I remember seeing a comedian named "Emo Phuillips". He was famous for about five minutes, but seems to have garnered a following in the teenage world. Some kids have no idea where the word "Emo" comes from, some do.  "Emo" kids wear long black hair, and have a strange haircut. Think "Beatles" from the sixties. (I guess history does repeat itself!) Even though she is blonde, my girl wants to say she is "Emo".


       Another way to explain Emos is like my daughter says, "Emos are just little boys acting like little girls". Too true, as most of these "boys" look like they would break under any kind of stress. I just don't get it. When I was a teenager, if a boy acted like a girl, he would catch a serious beat-down! (And deservedly so!) Things are strange these days!


       Just this past Saturday I spent a full day in the Tupelo Mall, about an hour South of where I live. I could not believe the "boys" that acted so effeminate! If I was a teen right now, I could spend all day beating the crap out of these pussies that call themselves boys!  Now, what about my girl?


        I look at it this way; if she wants to be Goth, fine. I would never try to make her someone she is not. As for these boys these days...stop whining that no girls want you, and start acting like you have a pair!(and not tits, either!)


;-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! ;-)

Monday, January 28, 2008

A Day In the Life Of----

So, how about a look into one day at my house? A couple of weeks ago, my oldest daughter was here with the grandchildren, Roze Marie, and Vinnie. She and my youngest were talking about who weighed what, so the bathroom scales found their way into our kitchen. Everything happens here in the kitchen, I have no idea WHY, just that it does!


      So the girls weigh, each in turn, and no, I will NOT post their weights. They both are so dammed skinny! Anyway, as you might guess, the little ones wanted a turn on the scales, too. I probably should mention at this point that these are the old scales, with the dial that rotates. Keep that in mind, please.  So then, after the little ones were finished, the only person left was me. "So, how much do you weigh, daddy?" I knew it was coming.


      Now, you need to picture my two daughters and two little grandchildren standing there with their heads down, and looking at the scale dial. Just before I stepped on the scales, I said, as a joke, "you guys may want to step back, as this thing will spin so fast that it will go up in flames"! Only rarely does EVERYTHING in the cosmos line up perfectly to make a "Kodak Moment". It happened on that day. The words had no more than left my mouth when each one of them took a step backwards! Even little Vinnie, who is only four years old!


         Just before I went into a fit of laughter that must have lasted for 30 minutes, I screamed that I couldn't believe ALL of them stepped back! I can only try to describe that scene with my words to you. Heaven knows that I am no "Mickey Spillane", or "Stephen King". I wish I had the words to tell you just what went through my head and my heart. I guess those are the times we remember when we meet our end. Maybe the Universe gives us those moments to lighten the burden of simply "being". Maybe those moments are Karmic "paybacks" for good deeds done in our lifetime? Who knows. I only know that I felt sheer joy and elation at that very moment in time!


   ;-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! ;-)

Thursday, January 24, 2008

When, My Love, When?

                                               When, My Love?


When, my love, will the hurt go away?

When, my love, will my heart recover it's former glory to you?

When, my love, will the pain subside?

When, my love, can I learn to love again?

When, my love, can I love you again?

When, my love, will you restore this old Dragon's heart.

When, my love, will you dry my tears?

When, my love, will you come to me freely?

When, my love, will this be over?

When, my love, will the music no longer make me cry?

When, my love, will I laugh as before?

When, my love, will you stop killing me little by little?

When, my love, will the hurt go away?

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Just a Little Joke

An Application For Permission To Date My Daughter...

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES__________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: _____________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain



A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?



In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?



In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?



In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?




Church you attend ___________________________________________________

How often you attend ________________________________________________

Whenwould be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:


B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:


C: A woman's place is in the:


D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:


E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________



F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:



Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)

_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual.
Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Diplomacy? When Did that Happen?

So, last week, in one of his speeches to no one in particular(except the gov't controlled media), Mr. Bush said that he has always stated that things could be handled with diplomacy! Really, when did he ever say that? Ask the people of Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Libya, North Korea, China, and I just bet they will call him a liar! Mr. Bush's idea of "diplomacy" is that you agree with him, or you are an "evil-doer". Diplomacy my Aunt Fanny's ass! George Bush wouldn't know diplomacy if it jumped up and bit him on the ass!


          As I listened to the news the other day, I heard them listing the countries who have, or are expected to have, nuclear warheads. As the list was read off, it was stated that Isreal "is strongly believed" to have them. Well, why not go in there like we did with Iraq? Why not find out for sure? Why just "suspect"? Make them tell the truth! Here is an even better idea...cut the THIRTY BILLION DOLLARS A YEAR funding to Isreal!


         We do NOT owe Isreal anything! Thirty Billion a year? Fuck that! The entire gross national product of that damn hole is less than that! The holocaust was 60 years ago. If they can't stand on their own feet by now, fuck them! I don't see that kind of money going to Africa, Austraila, China, Poland, Russia, Iraq, Iran, Libya, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Turkey, or many others! Fuck Isreal! If we dropped them, we would be in better standing in the Global Community.


          Don't you even consider me to be anti-semetic! I don't care what kind of people they are, why are they feeding at the teat of democracy and the free world when they are like the nations around them? Women have few if any rights there. Attrocities are commited by the Israelies to catch "terrorists". They even stole the land where they now live, with the help of the United States! Piss on them, they need us more than we need them! I say cut them loose, let them sink, they are only holding us back! That thirty billion a year could go to our National Debt. Which, I might add, was completely wiped out by Bill Clinton! Eat that, Republicans!


             On a lighter note, my youngest daughter turned 16 years old today! I hope she has a great day!

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Working at Home

So, there I was a few days ago, with nothing to do. The wife brings in a lap-top computer from where she works. She plugs it up, and it sort of works for a few seconds, then shuts off. She asks me to look at it.


       Upon close scrutiny by my highly un-trained eye, I see that the small power cord going into the back is frayed, and some of the bare wires are touching one another. Someone has done a rather shitty patch job on the power cord. I don't know who attempted this feat of stupidity, but they were as ignorant as they were cheap!


         Folks, if you have to splice four wires together, please use some solder, and a soldering iron! For shit's sake, it took me one hour to get things sorted out, and soldered up, then, they all had to be taped to keep them from touching! It's not like it was some kind of puzzle. There were four wires, and all had different colors,(red, white, black, etc...). It was as simple as falling off a log! If you want to do a job, then do it right, don't just half-ass it! I had a sergant in the Army who used to say, "there is never enough time to re-do a job, but plenty of time to do it right the first time".


:-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! :-)

Friday, January 4, 2008

"Rock Stars"?

"Rock Stars"...what a life that must be! I can remember back when rock stars made news just by tearing up hotel rooms, and wrecking cars when they were doing the drug d'jour! Nowadays, we have tradgedies like "Brittany". Taken out of her home after a three hour stand-off with police and other "officials". And just think, everyone said her husband, Kevin Federline, was a joke. Who's laughing now?


       But wait, there's more! Take Angelina Jolie, and Brad pit. They wanted to adopt a child. A noble aspiration, to be sure. So, what do they do? They go to some third-world country, and adopt some kids! No doubt liberal pay-offs to local authorities helped to insure a speedy "adoption". Hmm, I guess all of the available kids in the U.S. were taken? Yeah, right!


       Stupid people shouldn't breed...or adopt! What is wrong with the world today? I can tell you...liberals and  movie and rock stars! It is no wonder that Muslim-run countries call us the new Babylon! America looks like Rome just before the fall. This country should be run by people like me! Nearly every week we hear about another politician caught in a gay affair, or molesting some page, or volunteer! Our politicans are lazy and fat! They care for nothing, save lining their own pockets!


        You want to fight the "war on terror"? Put some of those fat, lazy fucking politicians in the war! It would become so bogged down that the other side would just give up! Have you seen the new public service announcements about terrorist attacks? A little kid asks his mom what to do in the event of an attack, and she says she doesn't know! Just more scare tactics from a pitiful and inefficient government! "Keep the people afraid, and they will turn to us"! Well, aside from that mother not having a plan, neither does our government! That's right! They have hiding places where they can go to be safe, but the rest of us? Sit down, put your head as far as it will go down between your legs, AND KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE!!! That is their "plan" for the rest of us!


:-) Holla' If You Hear Me!!! :-)