Can the wind recall the names it has carried in the past?
Can it recall, and bring them back?
The wind can remember all that it has borne,
The happy, the sad, the joyful, and the forelorn.
Yes, it can remember, but cannot bring them back,
What's gone is gone, what's past, is past.
For the wind is a beast, not easily tamed,
But the wind, it will never know my name.
By: John F. Goodson, Jr. Nov. 30, 2004
I never really knew what those words meant. I recently found out exactly what they mean...one of my "doves" was crying. Sadly, I didn't catch it in time, and this little "dove" was possibly harmed for a long time. I seem to learn every day that NO-ONE is to be trusted, EVER.
I will tend to my little "dove", but I will also deal with the one who has hurt my little "dove". My "dove" can be healed, I am not so sure of the person who hurt the "dove".......
Untill next we speak....keep a close eye on all your little "doves".
To find out more for yourself, and to draw your own conclusions, please go here;http://www.truthuncovered.com/
You need to see this.
OK, I spent the day in town with my wife. We had a lovely day, and got along swimmingly. So, enough of that fairy tale, we always get along. BUT, I saw something that TOTALLY disgusted me. And that ain't easy.
We were headed into one of the stores to shop, there was a "man" outside, ringing a bell for the Salvation Army. No biggie, it's that time of year. I looked at this guy, right in his eyes, because he was damn sure lookin' at me. This was not a nice person. You could tell if you just looked past his exterior....I have seen his type before; so have you.
You know the drill....haggard looking, hasn't shaved in a week, greasy hair, smelly, and he reeked of alcohol. Stay with me....As we were standing there, waiting to go in, he spots a young girl with three(3) small children(the oldest couldn't have been much over 4 years old). He called to her...not once, but three (3) times. She actually went to him.
Never mind the fact that they knew nothing of one-another, forget the fact that he might be a criminal, forget the fact that he is obviously an alcoholic....she walked right up to him with those three children! The FIRST statement out of his mouth was..."Don't you have someone to spend the holidays with"? (he couldn't see the three children???)
Here is where it gets REALLY STUPID. This girl starts acting very "coy", and answering his questions! I saw a mother of three small children actually go into what I call "school-girl mode". I couldn't believe it! We finally went in to the store, but not before I had already seen far too much!
It should be legal to go up and kick someone in the ass when they are doing something STUPID!! If this "girl" wants to place herself in a bad position with what is an obvious predator, fine, go for it. But, I have to wonder how much those children will suffer because their mom wants a quick lay.
Think about what you do. Do you REALLY want another generation of people like me? Do you even realize that I WILL NOT shake hands with people I haven't met before? Did you know that I do not hug people?? I find it repulsive. I don't "high-five" with people. And NO ONE touches me. Only my wife, daughters, and grand-children get to do that. It comes from a TOTAL lack of trust for others.
People tell me you can't go through life without human contact. I seem to do just fine without it. If I could just stay at home, I would be fine. If I go out, I am on constant alert, never missing ANYTHING. How could this girl not have some type of "radar", or something, to keep her safe?? How can people be so stupid, maybe "ignorant" is a better word for it??
It would seem that the "Bush War Machine" just keeps on rolling merrily along, thanks to all of you dick-heads who voted for him! Now, the machine has turned it's eye toward Iran, with an ever more threatening look.
Did I miss something here? Am I the only one to notice that Mr. Bush's cabinet is jumping ship faster than rats on a sinking boat? You don't quit the cabinet AFTER your man wins the election....WTF???
Is any of this sinking into your collective thick heads?? And now, Mr. Bush wants to challenge China? Has he forgotten that we had our ass handed to us back in the early 50's, over in Korea? And now, he wants to take over, or at least try to intimidate China, no less? Can he say, Vietnam??
I damn sure can! I had an uncle over there! I can remember being the only six (6) year old on my block that actually watched the evening news, EVERYDAY, just to see the soldiers on tv! I always hoped I would see my uncle. I never did, but he did come home alive; if you could call it "living".
Did we learn nothing from the Russians in the mid-east in the eighties? They got THEIR ASSES handed to them, also. Somewhere in a little country called Afghanistan....ring any bells?
We are in another Vietnam, and Mr. Bush wants to make it a "multi-faceted-war". Some asshole, back in 2001, decided to give Mr. Bush **FULL CONTROL** of ALL decisions made in this country. He now has more power than ANY American president to date!
I just can't say this enough times; "WAKE THE FUCK UP"!!!!!!! On another note, do you even KNOW how many innocent civillians have died in Afghanistan, and Iraq? Rolled over by Bush's war machine! You don't care, because they are mid-eastern? Think about how angry YOU were on Sept. 11, 2001. Multiply that times 10,000. That is how much THEY hate US!
Hate cuts both ways. Do you buy that shit they are feeding you on the news services? That all of these people were just waiting for "America" to come and save them? Have you NEVER heard of the Armed forces "big-wigs" staging these things?? Again, I ask, can you say Vietnam?
Everyone wanted revenge for Sept. 11, 2001. Has killing ANY of these people brought back even ONE of the Americans that were lost on that day? Has it? Is the loss of countless U.S. soldiers worth this so-called "revenge"? NO.
"Revenge is a dish best served cold". I always viewed this statement to mean wait, cool down, and figure out your options BEFORE you take action. NO ONE has done this in this case!
If you keep sticking your head in the sand, then WHO will watch your ass? Of course, YOU trust George W. Bush to keep it safe...........dumbass.
Well, well, I am back, kids! I managed to survive another day!! Now, I know that just pisses someone off, somewhere! I love bringin' you the straight skinny on things, you already know this, so now I have a question for YOU...the reader!
Think about this for a few minutes; I have taken a LOT of pot-shots at our government, especially one George Bush, Jr. Now, I know that I am realitivly unknown in the world, and I like that. But, I have noticed people who investigate UFOs, and are even less noteworthy (if that's possible), than me, get arrested, computers confiscated, and their homes ransacked on a routine basis! (wait, I am getting there)
Now, if you have been reading this entire journal, you KNOW that I said before that the gov't uses mis-direction to keep people guessing about UFOs. (if you DON'T know this, then shut-up, and pay attention!)
Could it be POSSIBLE, nay, even PLAUSIBLE, that our gov't makes "examples" out of these UFO nuts(no offense, guys), but leaves people like me alone, because they WANT you to believe in UFOs??? I mean, these guys aren't poking at the gov't per-se, the gov't just happens to get in the way sometimes.
What would you consider MORE important? A person who spreads dissent, and mistrust in the gov't(possibly, ME??), or some nut watching the skies for something that never existed? I would be inclined to "keep an eye" out for the former. But, that's just me!
As much as I have poked at the Federal Gov't, you would think that John Ashcroft himself would be pounding on my door! Instead, they go after these guys who watch for proof of UFOs.
Let me get this straight....the FBI can find some "crack-pot" out in the south-west dessert area of the U.S., all alone in some 30 foot long trailer, and they can't even find Bin Laden?? They spent 17 years trying to find the Uni-Bomber, for criminy sakes!!
There IS a cover-up here, but it is not what you think. The cover is that the Gov't simply wants you looking the wrong way, while they develop MORE weapons, MORE ways to kill people, and MORE and BETTER ways to decieve the American People!
WAKE UP!!! Dammit, people, stop just "assuming" that everything is OK!! It Isn't! It hasn't been for a very LOOONNNGGG time! The terroist threat? There isn't one! Just morePROPAGANDA to keep you afraid, and in line.
Maybe if the U.S. stopped trying to police the entire world, or stopped trying to tell other countries how to live. Here is a great idea, get the hell out of Israel! Stop funding their attacks against Palastine. They may have needed our help at one time, but not now. If a palastinian blows up himself in Israel, everyone goes nuts, Palastine is the "bad guys".
But, if Israel attacks innocent civillians in Palastine, then that is OK. What the hell is that about? And I want the head of the ASSHOLE who decided that Yassir Arafat should have recieved the Nobel Peace Prize!! The biggest terrorist of his time, and he recieves the Nobel Peace Prize....look again, the key words were "Peace Prize". Do you know what an Oxymoron is?? Anybody?
Good evening, my children. Someone commented that all geniuses are a little crazy. Almost correct; "There is a very fine line between Genius, and complete insanity". That's the way I heard it years ago, anyway.
"A fine line"?? Hmmm, seems that I play on both sides of that line. That is not intended to state, or even infer, that I, in any way, am a genius! LOL It does, however, infer, or state, that I can go from complete lucidity, to the very depths of the sublime. Confused? Welcome to MY WORLD.
Well, there goes the rest of my entry. My wife just came in and started playing in my hair(I have a VERY LONG ponytail). Complete and utter distraction! AND, she is showing off her legs to me!!
Sorry, kids, I'll catch you tomorrow...wink....wink!!!
There seems to be some confusion over yesterday's entry. Or, maybe it just shows the different ways different people can relate to things. What I wrote came from ME, not any doctor. The doctor I saw last Tuesday, only gave me an "assessment". Then he made an appointment for six weeks after that. He didn't actually tell me anything, except that he was prepared to put me into the hospital, to help me "conform"----yeah, right.
You see, a doctor's "concern" for his /her patients is only as deep as their next payment on that new Jaguar XK-7. I know this, and am not fooled by a nice smile, and some kind words. Hell, I could pull THAT off!
I do not merely "accept" things as they are, I question EVERYTHING, and always will. As to my writing??? Just chalk it up to me being me....that's all that I can be. Sometimes I get down, and stay that way for a few days, that is my world. BUT, like I said, after awhile, I get back on top.
As far as "getting tired of riding this roller-coaster", wouldn't you? This up-and-down shit has gone on for my entire life! Like I stated before..."little Johnny is broke, I doubt he can ever be fixed". Maybe, just because of that fact, that is how I get most of my ideas?????????
Depression...what is that like?? Just imagine if someone parked a fully loaded 10 ton dump-truck on your chest, then told you to escape. But you must escape RIGHT NOW, and do it quietly, so you don't disturb the "normals" around you. (I don't call you "normals", I prefer "Mundanes")
Now, free yourself from this crushing weight, NOW, get with it, you don't want to be "different". You MUST conform, be "well-adjusted", normal, like everyone else. Everyone screaming at you to conform, not letting up. But wait, just give it a few days, and you will be on cloud nine!!
It is like being drunk with power...everything is funny, everyone likes you, you just can't lose......then, someone parks that damn truck back on top of you. Welcome to my world....a land that is completely foriegn to you "Mundanes".
I think that I am tired of riding this roller-coaster.
Ahhh, I see some of my children are still with me; good. For today's lesson, let us look deep into that lump of grey-matter we loosely call "the human mind". A non-descript organ, about 2 1/2 to 3 pounds of lumps, with small, electrical charges running all over it. Very easily "fried" when hooked to a large electrical current!
We go through life with this lump in our skulls, some say it makes each individual who they are. It is strange, but in childhood, it seems(for the most part) to function OK. Then we "grow up". Just when you were skating through this mess that we call "life", with little, or no trouble, the damn thing goes haywire on you!
It is suddenly like everything has been wired up by a blind man. Everything you knew, just sort of gives way to a "new reality", a reality that has nothing to do with being "real" any longer. This doesen't seem to happen to everyone---those people who are "unaffected" want to tell those who are affected just what is wrong; for $200.00 an hour!
You see, it happened to me. Some say from being abused as a child....some say from my time in a motorcycle gang when I was young. Some even say that some of the things that my mother did when I was young was "sexual abuse". You got me...I'm not an "expert".
I think I know just when I "broke"? Stopped caring...just didn't give a damn, whatever. I think it was somewhere around the 50th beating from my mom. You know, the really good ones, where she took a large leather belt, and hit your bare legs until she cut you open and you would bleed all night. That might have been it. Or, maybe it WAS with the bikers, maybe around the fourth, or fifth biker I saw lying on the pavement, bleeding to death from wounds inflicted by guns, knives, or crashes??
I guess we will never quite know just when little johnny "broke". But we DO know one terrible thing.....little johnny can't be fixed! Sleep well........sleep LIGHTLY.
"A simple man, with a simple plan". I can hear you now---"what the hell is that about?" I just thought that if some of you have not started at the beginning of this journal, then you would not know who I am.
I am just that, a simple man. But, I can be very complex at times. How can I be complex? If I knew the answer to that, then I might not have to go see a shrink! I don't like change, at all! This past Tuesday, this new doctor offered to put me in the hospital. I declined, I told him there were too many "nuts" there.
You see, I don't do well with other people, especially those that I have no knowledge of. Call it fear of the unknown, but with me, it is more of a "control issue". I do not like situations where I have no control over what happens next (if anyone can ever have ANY control of anything, I think it is more of an illusion to placate our fears).
I am just a person who wants nothing more than to be left alone----yet, I come here and post all of the time?? A human paradox if ever I saw one! That's me, simple, yet complex. I can't even understand MYSELF, how can someone else ever HOPE to understand me?
A comet that burns brightly, yet stays hidden behind the moon, so no one can see. Dark and light, Yin and Yang, Good and Bad. How does it all fit together, to make a whole? I guess we will never know, at least , not in this life.
Have a good weekend, my children. Be safe, but most of all, be cool!!
Well, now, something has come up, here in the pages of what I loosely call my life. Seems someone was called "white-trash" by someone else. Hmmmm, I am not about to get into that one, but it got me to thinking...labels, and how we "aquire" them.
Now, take me for example...I am ;abeled as "biker", because of my back-ground, and the way I dress, and look, and talk, and view things. Other people see that I live in a large trailer, and say "white trash". Still others see me as a "redneck". And, others see me as a "bully", because I look mean, and don't talk to people when I am out.....hmmmm.
Now, the way I see it, I AM a biker, a veteran(army), a dad, and a grandfather, husband, Uncle, Son-in-law, and cousin(or "cuz" as we say). So, it seems that even I have labels for me. Wild, huh? It gets better....... Doctors call me "heart-patient, schizophrenic, bi-polar, manic-depressive, "post-traumatic-stressed", and some things that I could NEVER hope to spell!
At my favorite web-site, I am "administrator", to my wife, I am "husband", "provider", "lover", "friend". To my children and grandchildren, I am "dad", "protector", and "a pretty cool guy to know".
To my close neighbors, I am "quiet", "strange", "very probabally mean". What was that, about 20 some labels for just one guy? Most of those are correct, some not, but that is OK. I wear the one label that ALL of us wear constantly----HUMAN.
Now, go play with some "labels" yourself. And girls....you are free to continue your feudin'.
I know, I know, it is not Monday. Shut up! I know what day it is! I just feel like that old 80's song..."Just Another Manic Monday", by the Bangles?? Someone correct that if it is wrong, and I think it is.
What today? Not much, as it is only about noon-thirty here. Half a day gone, and I have done NOTHING productive. Well, I did post on our new web-site, and sent out welcome letters to new members. I DID manage to haul my ass out of bed today, so I guess that accounts for something.
I sat outside last week, late one evening, and said goodbye to summer once again. I have seen 44 of them come and go. Some of those summers hold LOTS of memories---actually, ALL of them hold SOME memories. I cannot remember ever having a bad summer.
Here's an idea just for today. No matter your age, who you are, how much you have(or don't have), stop for a few minutes, and recall your BEST summer ever, to date. I bet it brings a smile to your face, if only for a second. Try it, and remember to do this often. Or, get out there, and make some NEW memories!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wake up!! I am here, and ready to rock-n-roll!! My local doc sent me to a "new" shrink! They confirmed my worst fears----I'M CRAZY!!!!!!!!! I have to go back in about six weeks to see what this joker comes up with?? Here's a clue---my mother was insane, so was HER mother, chances are pretty good that I am a NUT also!!! See, I did that all by myself, and didn't need eight(8) years of college to figure it out! What a bunch of dumb-fucks! Shrinks are like fortune-tellers; they listen a little, and tell you all the obvious shit that you already know!! Jerk-offs! They even wanted to put me in the hospital TODAY!!
Now, I ask you, how the HELL can I bug people if I am locked down??? I AM CHAOS.....I MUST REIGN FOR NOW! Ain't it cool??
I just thought some of you needed to see this....like I said, I expose Gov't. lies when I can!!
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Subject: The 2005 Draft (Men and Women) 18-26
Sorry, guys. Today is Saturday, and there is nothing going on, plus I am having lots of pain in my left arm. It is just over a year since I had my first "light" heart-attack. Someone define "light" for me???
I have been shot, cut, never stabbed(but not for lack of someone always trying!!LOL), I've been run over by assorted machinery, and animals, fallen off of far more than anyone ever should, and I cannot recall a pain as bad as a "light" heart-attack.
So, as the kids say(or used to say), I am just chillin' wit' the homies! Have a good weekend everyone, and remember, If you can't laugh at yourself, then someone else will be glad to do it for you.
Good day to all my peeps! Guys, girls, undecideds, whoever you are! Welcome to one and all!! Settle down in the back, I see ya'. And for goodness's sake, quit eating those damn chips at your 'puter, it gets the keys all oily!! Now, what was the subject.....oh, yeah, BULLIES.
Here is a little known fact--in the first grade, a kid beat me up when I was walking home(it was the sixties, we could walk home back then). No big deal, right? Well, he did this EVERYDAY---up to the third grade! I hated fighting, but I didn't like getting beat up, either.
One day, my stepdad decided to pick me up at school. I have no idea why, he showed little or no interest before that. Anyway, he gets there late, so he found this kid(who was bigger than me), beating the shit outta me. I thought, great, finally some help. My stepdad was 6' 6" tall, and weighed in around 400 pounds. Big, dumb, and mean, a truck driver.
He snatched me up from that hell on earth, and took me home. I was soo proud of him at that moment....but fate is a cruel, cold-hearted bitch. My stepdad beat the shit out of me right then and there, and my mother joined in. I was betrayed,and, it seems, I had committed an affront to them that was socially unacceptable! I was actually beaten up in public. This would not stand!
After spending most of the night as a punching bag for my stepdad, I was allowed to sleep for a couple of hours, then sent to school, with just ONE condition; I was to hunt down that boy, and hurt him. I did. I had only been at school for about two minutes when he came walking up the sidewalk.
I jumped him right there. At first, he just laughed. But then it got ugly, and I did more damage than ANY third-grade child should EVER be allowed to. No one stopped me, they continued to let me kick this boy in the head, and anywhere else I could. He was crying at first, then he fell silent, and someone pulled me away. It was not over...it never will be.
Something inside me snapped that day. I knew no one would ever pick on me again, I would see to that personally. The other boy? He only ended up with a small concussion. Did he bother me again? Yes, just a few days later, and he got the same. Then the roles were reversed. I was once timid, and would try to run from him....not anymore. Now, I did the chasing, AND the beating!
The point of all of this? As you read this, one would be tempted to be mad at the other kid, because he was a bully. Now, read it again, and pay attention this time. The REAL bully here is the stepdad. I thought he would help me. I was wrong, and never made that mistake again.
Bullies now? Well, they come in a different form, as I recently learned. Bullies nowadays can even be young, spoiled little girls with computers, and waaaaayyyy too much time on their hands.
Now Play Nice with each Other!!
Welcome my children, to the show that never ends!! How are all of you today? Shut up---it was a rhetorical question!!! If you have problems, Email me with them, don't tell it here!! Damn, I love my job!! "But, please, oh wise and mighty Dragon Master, what IS your job"? Ahhh, it has come to that, has it??? Welllllll.........
My job is to point out Gov't lies, Corporate lies, any deciet going on in the world right now. Aliens? You better be worried about Earth-bound aliens for now, brothers!! My job is to pick at the festering scabs of the world as we know it, and to make them open up, to become infected with that most vile of ALL diseases, TRUTH!!! There is no cure for TRUTH!!
And on that note, my little turtle is konfuzed, and cannot "chirp" anymore---looks like I need to put it down, and just walk away. Don't worry if you don't get it, the right people most certainly will! Or not--you know what I say, "fuck 'em and feed 'em fish-heads"!!
"But, Dragon Master, is that ALL that you do"? Most certainly not! I also take up for the under-dog, the little guy who gets stepped on in society. I have been an "outlaw" all of my life. Even in my home as a child. I have been the "under-dog" many times, but I got over it, and decided to stand on my own two feet! "I will die on my feet before I will serve on my knees"!!
Suffering from a GOD complex? I don't think so...unlike GOD, I am HERE, and I actually get involved! The belief that there is a "Supreme Being" that oversees everything is just preposturous. Ask the 6 million Jewish people who died in WWII---oh, wait, they are DEAD! See my point? If you read that the wrong way, then go back to school, I AM NOT anti sematic.
So, what was the point of today's rant?? I feel like stirring up some trouble. Surely by now, most of you KNOW just how my SICK mind works!!! If you don't, then please, climb aboard the "Train of lost thought". We have room for anyone who just wants the truth from this shitty world of "damage control", "spin artists", "half-truths", and whatever else people decice to call LYING!
By the way, bush won---geez, who DIDN'T see that coming????????? Now, go stir up some trouble yourself, I amtoo busy with mine to help you!!! I love being an asshole sometimes!!!!!!!!
I never threatened anyone on the site, I merely told that person that I would hand deliver ALL of their posts to their home! THIS IS MY PAGE! You DO NOT come here and malign me.....you had better wake up and look around. I am not a person you want to make mad. Maybe your bosses need to see some of the letters you have written to me???
Maybe they need to know just how you ban people from a site for specific reasons, but continue to let two people CONTINUE to break the rules?? Maybe you should look at Fishee's ADVERTISING on the site---clearly against the rules!! Maybe you should see someone about "PULLING YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS!!!!!!!
And for anyone else who reads this, Marc Meyers works for Smoke Away corp. They make a good product, they just have lousy employees!!!!!!!
Also, if you would like to contact Mr. Meyers with suggestions on just HOW to recover his head from his ass, then, by all means, try these..............
Marc Meyer emersondirect 239-449-2607 239-594-2562-fax 412-901-8456-cell mmeyer@emersondirect.net I am sure that Mr. Meyers would LOVE to hear from you---------ALL OF YOU!!!!!!! Delete that, Marc!So, anyone out there need a fresh, witty, no-holds-barred Moderator? Someone who is NOT afraid to speak the truth? Someone who will always fight the "establishment" for the truth? Someone who will ALWAYS fight for the "underdog" out there?
Don't be shy! Personal photos are available upon request.
****************DISCLAIMER**********************
I reserve the right to reject any or all offers if I deem so neccessary.
You know something, life is like a puzzle. One of those really big-ass puzzles, like a thousand pieces or so. You land on this shitty little rock one day, and the next, someone throws all of these pieces at you, and then says "solve the puzzle".
What they never tell you is that LOTS of key pieces are missing..........................................................................
For "mood" I put frustrated...not an accurate description, really. "PISSED OFF" sounds better. You see, I broke my own rules, and had a couple of "friends". For now, let's just call them "Biggest Ass", and "Killjoy". You see, I learned very early in life that "friends" are the first to fuck you over. I guess some things never change!
You would think after 44 years of surviving the absolute worst that this shitty world can throw at someone, I should know better! Geez, I got screwed, and didn't even get dinner or a thank you! I have worked tirelessly for 11 months on a certain website(no names, at least I have SOME integrity, even if they don't), for free. That's right, no pay, and I was a sucker for doing it.
After being publicly humiliated by these two "friends", I quit the site. I wasn't mean about it, I just quit. Others quit right along with me, but the "friends" decided to delete my posts BEFORE anyone else saw them!! Now I have confused people asking me what is happening, and they are quitting the site as well. Seems more people like me than I even knew.
At this point, I should do or say something gracious, maybe "please, don't quit the site just because I did". Yeah, right. Fuck that....quit in DROVES!! You are being lied to! They are keeping information from you!! I even had my account frozen, so I could NOT post that I quit!! I can't even go back in and delete the over 2,000 posts that I have made these past 11 months!
"Big Brother" is everywhere, people. Even on a simple little free website! Don't get sucked in by having "friends", they are the first to stab you with the "Dagger of Betrayal". I have always said "keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer", looks like I should re-think that advice.......
Oh, yeah, for those who know......."chirp, chirp?? CHIRP CHIRP, DAMMIT, CHIIIRRRPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
