Staying Out of "The Void"

 So, to stay out of "the void" I have been trying to write as much as I can. And don't worry, my little minions...you shall not miss a thing; I am putting everything right here on these pages. Now then, a few days ago someone asked me, "what are your favorite things to drink"? Well, that is complicated(oh come on, you KNEW it would be!).

 

           First off, and everyone here knows this one...Beer! Any kind is fine with me. If I have a choice, I like Milwaulkee's Best...I hope I spelled that right? Budwieser is ok. My all time favorite is Coors and Millers. No lite beer for me, I hate that shit. You might as well drink panther piss. So, we have that covered. Oh, and imported beer is ok, but too pricey. Sam Adams is ok, too.

 

             Tequila!! Not just any kind, either. I only like the kind that my daughter brings back from Mexico for me when she goes. Since she only goes to Mexico once a year, then it is all that much sweeter! Whiskey is next. Jack Daniels, Canadian Club, Wild Turkey, any kind is ok with me. Whiskey is whiskey, period. I see beer as a "social drink". I see whiskey as a bracer, something to give you the false courage to take on the Biker at the end of the bar! You know, to do shit that will get you severely maimed, shit you wouldn't normally do! I only want whiskey if I am pissed off, and want to start some shit. And because of that, I tend to leave it alone.

 

           Next is "Moonshine", "White Lightning", "Shine", "White Whiskey" "Lightning in a Bottle", "The Blue Flame". This stuff is nearly 200 proof, and can sometimes take the paint off of your car! Everyone has heard of it, but I live in a place where it can still be bought. The drink is ok, but getting it could cost you your life. 'Shiners don't like lengthy prison sentences. Better to shoot someone they don't know than to go to jail...they can always hide the body. So, don't go snooping around another man's still...it could cost ya'.

 

             In the vein of 'Shine, my daughter brought back some Mexican 'Shine last year. They make this stuff out of cactuses, or is that 'cacti'? Anyway, this stuff is clear, and will most certainly knock your socks off! The tasteis a little rough, but it goes down smooth enough, and always has the desired effects.

 

             Alright, at the bottom of the list is wine, wine coolers, and what I call "chick drinks"; Pina Coladas, Screwdrivers, any other mixed drinks. "Party Drinks" is another good name for them. If I am drinking 'hard liquor', I drink it straight from the bottle. Fuck all that mixin' and shit! If I have to choose between mixed drinks and beer, give me a bottle of Millers, and call it a night. I can't remember what all goes into some mixed drinks, so I'll just take mine, "neat". That is about all I need to know about ordering drinks in a bar. Speaking of bars...

 

         I have been in a bunch of bars in my life, but never in a "club". You know the kind of bar I am talking about, right? Biker bars, sawdust on the floor, dark as hell, loud juke-box in the corner playing some Lynyrd Skynyrd, or David Allen Coe, or some shit like that. Maybe they have a girl waiting tables, or two of them. Sometimes they have a live band on the weekends, sometimes not. You know if you stay long enough you will get to see at least one fight, maybe more. I used to call it "drinks and theatre". And, if you are lucky enough, you just might be involved in one of the fights! What a way to let off some steam.  And that, my friends, is what I like to drink, and where I like to drink it. But these days, I do my drinking at home. We don't have any biker bars around here. As a matter of fact, I actually live in a "dry" county. We have to drive a ways to get booze here. Sucks, don't it? Well, as they say, "Thus endeth the lesson".

 

             :)Holla' If You Hear Me!!!:)