Well, my friend Bob has gone all philisophical on me. I am really confused by that, but he IS giving good advice, so I will just see how far he takes it. I kind of like it, though! Not much to report today. Things at home are still the same...shitty and strained. Guess it will stay that way untill I finally leave. Sounds strange, but it will come to that. I hate it, but it is the final solution. Either that, or something worse.
I am not working on anything today, I sort of took the day off. Like I said yesterday, I am still recovering from Saturday. I still say it was worth it, even if I did have to return to the hell that is "home". I am trying to come up with a new design for the knives. I don't really like the current design, it was only intended to be an initial proto-type anyway. Other people seem to like the design, but as an artist,(and I use that term loosely), nothing is ever "finished" for us. It really sucks sometimes, being like that.
Ok, how about the state of my mental self? Fucked up! Really fucked up! I have been on this medicine for over a year now, and I can see no change. If anything, my mental state seems to have worsened. I hate those around me, and can only imagine doing really bad things to them....some of them. Paranoid? Not really, I just don't trust ANYONE, and I believe NOTHING that the wife says to me. She is the embodiment of lying and back-stabbing. She has tried my patience at every turn...and now it is running thin. Oh, the things that run in my brain! If some of you only had even a tiny clue...
Holla' If You Hear Me!!!
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