The Crossroads

 It is often said that one can tell the difference between pure bullshit, and a fairy tale quite easily. A fairy tale begins with "once upon a time", and pure bullshit begins with "You ain't gonna believe this shit, but".....

 

          Well, you ain't gonna believe this shit, but....I went to my Uncle once with a problem. It wasn't anything that threatened the stability of the world, but it was important to me. I can't even remember what it was now, but I remember the lesson my Uncle taught me. This one was actually easy to learn, and didn't involve any pain(for once!).

 

       As I recall, I needed to make a decision about something, but I was putting it off because I was too afraid, or just too lazy to make the decision. Here begins the "lesson", as taught to me by my Uncle.

 

             He taught me the lesson by telling me a story about an old biker, and he was headed toward a crossroads in his life. This was another way of saying that he had a major problem to be dealt with. Well, the old biker(all of my Uncle's stories were about "old bikers", deal with it...I did.) found that the way to the crossroads was long, winding, and fraught with pitfalls and dangers. Before he made it there, he sat down on the side of the road. "Fuck it", he said, "this is too much trouble".  "Maybe I just won't go to the crossroads, maybe I will just stop here, and go back the way I came".

 

           "You can't do that" a voice said to him. The old biker looked around, and out of the swirling dust on the road there appeared a tall, thin man. Nice suit, long fingernails, and smoking a cigarette. "No, no, that just won't do. You can't go back now that you are here!"   "Just who the fuck are you, dude", the old biker growled. "Well, let's just say that I help folks like you when they are in a bind. There is, of course, a small fee that must be paid for my assistance".

 

          The old biker explained the nature of his dilemma, and that he wanted no more of trying to get to the crossroads(the problem), as it was just too much trouble. Well, the tall, dark stranger gave this a bit of thought, and told the old biker that for the small fee, he would make the crossroads(the problem) go away. The biker agreed. The man changed into what looked like a Demon from Hell. The biker was astonished! "You're a demon", he cried. "No, my friend, not a demon, but THE DEMON! Satan himself, at your service"!

 

          The biker found out two things in very short order; His problem was taken care of, and he had just paid the "small fee"....it was his soul. At that instant, the biker, and Satan simply disappeared into thin air, never to be seen again. The biker, that is. I have heard that Ol' Satan still travels that road, looking for people in trouble.

 

       My Uncle was fairly beaming after telling me that story. I was confused. "What the fuck does that have to do with ME" I said. "I have no idea, I just like telling that story!"  But, strangely enough, there WAS a message there. I think the message was that you, and only you, can solve your problems. If you wait for someone else to do it for you, it can have tragic results. Putting off something major is just as bad, and can have the same results.

 

           The other thing I gleaned from that story is that I needed to quit going to my Uncle for advice!! For fuck's sake, he didn't really know anymore than I did!

 

                   Holla' If You Hear Me!!!