The Mysteries of "Writer's Block"

  I was searching for something 'profound', or 'sage-like' to write for today. Searching myself, NOT the internet. I couldn't find anything!?  My muse seems to have left me again, for a time. I try to give her just 'a little space', and she forgets where she should be. Then it hit me, write about females...the Bane of every man; a woman. I fear that this may end badly for me when certain females read this..........

                Men; we are simple animals, really. Sort of like "human dogs". Throw us some food, a little beer, TV, and a little sex once in a while, and we are content. When we marry, it is usually for life....we positively HATE CHANGE. Why do you think we keep underwear untill you can see through it? We are not hard to figure out. Tell us you want to go somewhere, we only need time enough to get the car keys, and we are ready!

                 Men shopping? That mainly consists of us walking through the store and putting things into the buggy that look interesting to eat. There is no more thought than that to it, girls. Eating out? Steak and potatoes will do just fine---we could care less what them damn "frenchies" are eating! Anything with ketchup is just fine. Oh, yeah, and a couple of beers to wash it down with.

                 Females...if you want to go out, let's say at 8:00 pm, you start getting ready at 3:00 pm! And you are almost ALWAYS LATE!!! In those five hours, we can change the oil in the car, mow the lawn, and catch a ball game on tv! Oh, yeah, and wash it all down with a few beers! And let's not forget the obligatory "does this make me look fat"? quote from you girls. Look, if you are a size 16, don't try to fit into a size 8 dress, because, yes, it WILL make you look fat! Wear what is comfortable...we love you no matter what your size. If we didn't, we wouldn't still be there for you to ask the question to!

                 And, please, if you want to hang pictures, or do other things around the house for yourselves that requires you to read a tape-measure, LEARN TO READ IT!!!  You simply cannot measure something, and then tell me it is "16 inches, and some dots"!!!!! That just doesn't work! And STOP buying those damn 'teddy-bear' checks! Do you realize how goofy it looks when we go to Home Depot, and write on those damn things?? It just isn't right.

              The whole point to this exercise is to point out that women are FAR DIFFERENT from men. I guess that book is right, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I just don't see HOW we ever get along together with all of the differences between us. Or, maybe it is because of those differences......................I leave that up to you to decide.

 

                       Holla' If You Hear Me!!!

I have been quit for 1 Year, 10 Months, 2 Weeks, 1 Day, 18 hours, 27 minutes and 56 seconds (685 days). I have saved $1,800.13 by not smoking 24,001 cigarettes. I have saved 2 Months, 3 Weeks, 8 hours and 5 minutes of my life.